


Crescendo

by bigmeanies



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Angst, Art, Bloodplay, Consensual Non-Consent, Demacia (League of Legends), Eventual Smut, F/M, Feels, Hate to Love, I'm Bad At Tagging, Love/Hate, Masks, POV First Person, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sad, Spanking, Violent Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2021-01-05
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:40:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 25,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28259334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigmeanies/pseuds/bigmeanies
Summary: One. Two. Three. Four.Four flowers, four lanterns, four badges.While attending an unforgettable performance, you noticed the works of Khada Jhin in the making.You wake up in a dark room, alone.
Relationships: Khada Jhin/Reader
Comments: 36
Kudos: 68





	1. Act I. Scene I

**Jandelle, Demacia**

Demacia had always been a city looked upon from afar as a lawful kingdom. Demacian's were brave, futile people, who stopped at nothing when it came to justice. Duty was of uttermost importance.

Yet you had always felt so out of place when compared to your friends. Recently, it felt like it was been getting worse. You were to follow your duties and eventually take your Uncle's place as captain in the elite military that Demacia held. Fighting wasn't really your thing though. You always had a spot in your heart for the arts. When you could, you always replaced your scheduled training times with your father with many, _many_ , long hours sitting at the rugged, beaten down piano you and your best friend, Ophelia, had found when you were children. It always sat in a small unnoticeable shack a couple of miles away from your home. You would often meet Ophelia there, who would sit there and listen to you all day. She marveled at your skill, which had been honed in from the start.

The same melancholy piece your fingertips had always played continued on. It was about time to head back now.

Sighing, you sat up from the leather stool that had been abandoned many years ago. You grabbed your school bag and began the trek home where your mother and father would be waiting for you. You'd been gone much longer than any other day, and your mother specifically told you this morning to be home right after your classes. 

You untied the reigns on your horse and started off.

Your mother was worried sick when you finally arrived, waiting for you in the dim light of your living room. She stood up rapidly when she saw you open the door. 

"Where were you? Have you not heard the news?" She exclaimed, rushing to you. Her cold hands pressed against your cheeks, tapping her fingertips against them lightly. She looked into your eyes, where she found nothing but emptiness. You sighed for what felt like the hundredth time that day alone. She grabbed your face and pulled you in for a hug. "He's out of prison, the Golden Demon." You gasped lightly and pulled back.

"How? For how long?" You asked. The Golden Demon had been a legend, some denied his existence entirely. Demacian's seemed to have a hard time believing in him, but your mother was not a true Demacian. She was born in Ionia, where the Demon had terrorized her home after she'd left. Because of him, some of your family had been part of his horrific performances.

"For a while now. I only found out through a letter—your aunt sent it to me a month ago—I only got it today." She informed you. You felt helpless, afraid to know the horrors of what had happened when he escaped. You weren't close with your extended family, but you hoped they were safe and out of his path of destruction.

"Where is father?" You asked, noticing his missing presence. 

"Community ball, we were supposed to be there an hour ago," She started, "but _someone_ decided to disappear on me yet again." You muttered a sheepish "sorry."

"Well. Get dressed please, we need to be leaving soon." A nod. Still, you felt extremely unsettled by the news you had just heard. There was something so eerie hearing it from your mother. Although you knew that he had no reason to be in Demacia (that you could think of) you still felt a sheer pang in your gut.

You put your belongings away in your room and began to tidy yourself up. You put your hair in a half up half down hairstyle with a bun shaped like a petal. It draped the backing of your hair and curled the pieces that were not held up. Having to attend these events quite often, you had amassed quite the collection of ball gowns to wear. You were by no means wealthy, hence why you lived so far from the city. Your uncle had supplied you with these dresses, as you were to be the captain eventually, and someone to be as important as you were to be needed gowns to wear to these types of events.

You chose a baby pink one, it matched your skin color perfectly. Adding some nice heels with it, you looked beautiful. 

You had never actually enjoyed these events, if anything, you were only compliant on going because Ophelia would be there. You usually just made fun of the seriousness of it all. You smiled to yourself.

Grabbing a clutch that held your ID, you walked back to your mother. You would be needing it when you arrived.

"Ready?" She asked you, gazing over your attire. She found an eyelash on your cheek. Plucking it off, she put it in front of your mouth, smiling.

"Make a wish, darling." You smiled back and wished that this time, the performance would be worth dying for.

You blew the eyelash away.


	2. Act I. Scene II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bonzYj0NzUU&ab_channel=TheMusicHour
> 
> ur gonna need this to really feel the feelings i think, its generic but it really kind of set the mood for this.
> 
> TW: graphic depictions of violence and gore.

Upon arriving, you noticed Ophelia right off the bat. Fashionably late, as usual. 

"I'll be right in, mother," You said hastily, rushing towards your best friend. A crowd began, all trying to push into the castle's stage entrance. You tried to push past, but Ophelia was no longer standing where you had last seen her. You frowned, moving your head from side to side looking for the familiar set of blonde locks you had been around to watch grow, change, and cut throughout your life. 

You pushed through the crowd of people. _I'll find her in the audience, I guess._

You now walked alone through a surge of people anxious for the ball while still scanning the area for your best friend.

With no luck, you finally reached the doors, passing through them as everyone else was. 

Now, you were looking for where your family was stationed. You were beginning to feel anxious, in a big crowd, thousands of people, and nobody you knew. No neighbors, no family, all strange faces you'd never seen before. _It wouldn't hurt to ask somebody, right? That's not weird._

You cleared your throat and settled on an older man. He held a cane and stood alone, hunched over. You couldn't see his face, but you were sure he could use some company. For a moment, anyway. You walked over to the man, clutch at your side.

"Excuse me, sir?" He looked up, eyes meeting yours through a porcelain mask. He said nothing. There was something about his presence that unnerved you, being met with a mask is not something that is seen in Demacia, considering honor and lawfulness are pretty big things to hold. "D-Do you... Sorry, have you seen any one of the Uphane family here? I lost my mother in the crowd back there and she didn't exactly tell me where they'd be." You chuckled, obviously uncomfortable.

The man smiled a great evil under his mask unbeknownst to you. 

"No, I haven't," He lied, "I didn't know they had a daughter. Tell me, what is your name, dove?" The man asked. You shifted your weight and looked at your shoes. _Dove_. 

"(Y/N) Uphane. Just, if you see them, could you tell them I'm looking for them?" She lifted her gaze back up to look at the eyes of the man in the mask. He nodded and looked off towards a door. Embarrassed, you said a quick goodbye and turned to leave the castle. 

You wanted a little bit of fresh air, and you didn't even really feel like attempting your search again right this second anyway. You could use some time away, so you sat down on the bridge that overlooked a small lake.

You noticed something off in the distance.

You squinted your eyes and tried to block the moonshine from your eyesight, it was reflecting from the lake.

Four golden flowers on the surface of the lake. They glinted in the pale light beautifully. You got up and turned away from the lake, now leaning your backside against the bridge wall. You closed your eyes and thought about what was to be of your life in the coming years. You'd always dreamed of being a famous composer, travelling all over Runeterra to play for anybody who wanted to listen. It was the one thing you felt good doing. Music transformed you, it consumed your thoughts on a daily basis. Ophelia always talked of running away from our duties, you were similar in that way. You both had never felt like true Demacians, never feeling your place in this city.

You opened your eyes, basking in the light of the celestial object in front of you. You looked down to the string that held what your attention had been turned to. Four lanterns, golden in hue. Red handles. You quickly turned around to face the lake again, but this time you looked up. Another four lanterns, golden in hue. Red handles. Your eyes widened. You looked at the symbols on the lanterns. Ionian badges, small but there to look at in close range. Your heartbeat quickened. 

Your thoughts were interrupted by a loud bang coming from the inside the castle. The ground rumbled at the sound just a second after. You snapped your head in the direction and ran towards the stone double door. You pulled with all your might trying to get the door open by yourself, and what you saw when you looked in was breathtaking.

Bodies scattered the floor, littered with fragments of flowers waiting to be uncovered. To anybody else, it looked to be a masterpiece. You knew now. You knew this was the work of the Golden Demon your mother had told you stories about growing up. Terrorizing the people of Runeterra, until his reign was stopped abruptly, and was put in prison. You looked around, stricken with a gut feeling you were the only one here alive now. From the cracking columns in the castle, you knew it'd been blown. You followed the trail of unmoving bodies. Stray flowers from severed limbs painted this picture, and it was a gory masterpiece. You were in such shock you hadn't even entered the only other room there was.

The stage room.

You gulped down your stomach bile that was threatening to rise and pushed open the door.

You'd never seen such a magnitude of bodies, you recognized people in this room. Neighbors. Teachers. Military personnel. You glanced, looking for anybody in your family. Your mouth stood agape, tears threatened to fall. 

There, in the front row, your parents were strung up. They hung from the old gallows that used to reside here. Flowers bloomed from your mother's face. You immediately brought your hands to your mouth and screamed. Running to your deceased parents, you grabbed the sword which hung from your father's armor and cut them down. They fell to the floor with a thud, but you couldn't hear anything besides your own shrieks of terror. Your throat was raw, and you cradled your mother's head in your arms, brought it to your chest, and rocked back and forth. Your thumb caressed her cheek on instinct. The piercing sound of your screams for your parents echoed throughout the lifeless castle now. 

Your once baby pink dress that you had arrived in was now stained red from the seeping blood that had pooled all around you. You grabbed your father with your other arm and sobbed.

"I'm so sorry," You repeated through your screams and sobs. You hiccuped and threw up to the side, so revolted by the works of Khada Jhin. The only thought that resided in your head was _why?_

You finally opened your eyes and noticed those golden locks by the stairs of the stage. You placed your parent's bodies down carefully and slowly walked over to the body you were praying it wasn't who you thought it was.

"O-Ophelia.." You finally said, looking at her face. Her deep blue eyes still lay open, a rose blossomed through her chest. She looked so hauntingly beautiful. 

With each movement you took, you remembered every minute of your life spent with your best friend who was now just a lifeless body who lay in front of you. It looked like she was headed to try to save your parents, but was shot on the way. You closed her eyes with shaky hands, sobbing.

You cried, cried until there was nothing left to come out. 

You lay next to her, whimpering so quietly even you could barely hear yourself. You slowly drifted off into a state of emptiness that was your dream. 

When you awoke, you were in an unfamiliar place. Your eyes felt puffy, your skin cold. You shivered, pulling up a blanket that had been kicked off of the bench where you laid. You tried to keep your eyes open, but the flood of darkness felt better than being awake, so a deep slumber you slipped into.


	3. Act I. Scene III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i've literally just created like 3 chapters spanning from 1 am to 6 am what am i doing.

A light.

You hadn't given much thought as to how you would die. From what your duty was to be, you always thought it would be at the hand of war. Maybe if you were lucky, you would die surrounded by your best friend and your children. 

Your eyes tore open.

Never by yourself in a strange room you didn't recognize. 

You'd been changed, no longer wearing the pink ball gown you last remembered donning. Instead, it was replaced with a white slip-on nightgown. Your memory had been hazy, waking up a couple of times in a number of different rooms. Now, you were in a lavish room. A silky, red blanket was atop you now, covering your shivering body. You peered around, the blanket covering your face now with only the top of your head visible. Three doors, a fireplace, a window, and a dark silhouette of an object in the darkest corner of the room. 

You got up to explore the mysterious room you were being kept in. 

The first door, a walk-in closet with a vast selection of dresses and nightgowns filling the entire area. You felt overwhelmed just by looking at them and shut the door behind you. You moved on.

The dresser was extravagant, cherry wood with red and gold bezels that gleamed from the chandelier above it. Undergarments, socks, typical clothes you would find in a dresser. The next door led to a large bathroom. There was a separate space for a shower and a tub, with a large mirror on the wall. You looked into it. Your soft (H/C) locks were neatly cut to shoulder length, you instinctively reached to touch where it used to fall and gasped lightly. You reached up to where it now lay resting on your shoulders. You ran the water and splashed cold water on your face to reduce the puffiness that was your face. You looked like a completely different person. You looked one last time in the mirror before you shut the light off and left the area. 

Leaving the bathroom, you rested your hand on the third and last door. You were about to turn it when you noticed what the object in the corner of the room was.

A grand piano. 

It was black, sleek. Elegant. Nicer than any one you'd ever seen.

You sat down at the stool. The comfortable leather was not cracked, and it looked to have never been used before. 

Your fingertips graced the white and black keys, playing a familiar melancholy song. You became lost in this tune, feeling your emotions boil up and over like a pot of water would above a fire. Spilling out, you closed your eyes. 

The bridge became a solo that only you knew the chords to, nobody else. You played until your fingers hurt, and you no longer had any emotions to pour out. 

You sat there for a while, putting your head against the keys to make an awful sound. Eventually, the sound drifted away and all you could hear was the beating of your heart pumping blood through your body.

"I see you've made good use of your gift." A frightfully deep voice said from the doorway. You immediately turned around at the sound.

The man in the mask. Khada Jhin. You gulped, cowering into the dark corner where the piano was kept.

Jhin smiled in a sickly way from underneath his mask as he often did. He reveled in the fear he brought the you. He reveled in the fear he brought anybody, for Khada Jhin was a man who liked being in power. He strode over to the your cowering form, hands behind his back and Whisper tucked safely at his hip. As he got closer, you curled into a ball and wept. Seeing this brought distaste to him. He reached out to your cheek and caressed it softly with his thumb. You flinched and didn't dare look into the eyes of your captor. 

"Shhh, darling. We have so much time together, why spend it so meaninglessly? After all, you were my greatest performance," He said, chuckling to himself.

"Please, just kill me, please," You begged softly, your gaze still not reaching his eyes. You couldn't fathom wanting to live at all after what you had just gone through. You were sure that as long as you did live, you would never feel whole again. You would see the memories of your mother and father's lifeless bodies covered in the illusion of the Golden Demon forever.

Jhin grimaced and tore his hand back quickly from her. 

"And destroy my masterpiece? You petulant girl," He grabbed you by the face harshly and pulled you closer to his mask covered face. "I _own_ you. There's no going back to _Demacia_ now." He spat. He threw your face back so forcefully that your body couldn't catch up with the velocity. You crashed into the bench of the piano. With that, he left the room hastily.

The only sign that Khada Jhin had even been in your presence was the heartbreak he left in your grieving soul. 


	4. Act I. Scene IIII

There you laid, draped against the piano bench. Your gaze had settled on the door handle and had been there since your captor left the room. The only sound in the room was the sound of your gentle breathing mixed in with the rain pounding against the glass panes. There, you thought of all the things you would never get to say to your parents. You always knew there was a day that would come where you would tell them that the career path they had shown you was far from the one you had wanted so dearly, you didn't think it would be taken away from you so quickly. Though you dreaded that day to come, a part of you wanted to have the courage to tell them. For you were not a brave girl, you were a scared one. This you hated, and a piece of you longed to be like Ophelia. She had gentle eyes and a warm heart. So brave, so courageous. You wished so badly to be just like her. Always catching the village boys' attention, and even some of the girls. Everywhere she went she had a beautiful aura around her. You supposed this was why she died. She cared so much that she tried to rescue your parents, and now you would never see her again. 

Your face was wet, and you were surprised. You were not sure you even could cry anymore. You felt a wave of nothingness resume its control over your brain as quickly as your sadness drifted. There was only room for one emotion at a time, it seemed.

You sighed, barely audible, bringing your sleeved hand up to wipe the wetness from your cheeks. 

It had been quite a few hours since your captor had fled the room you were being kept in. The monster that he was, you couldn't help but wonder what it was that plagued his thoughts, turning him into what he was known by today. Khada Jhin was a ruthless entity, many not even being sure that he was a man. You wondered why he didn't kill you that night with the rest of your village. You wondered what the reason for killing your parents in such a brutal and violent way was, for all your life you knew your parents to be kind-hearted people. The type of people that would quite literally give the shirts off of their backs to you. 

You remembered a day where you and your parents were walking around the market, you were only six years old then. There was an old beggar that had caught your eye. Tugging on your mother's skirt, you pointed at the old woman and asked her why she looked like that. That was the day you learned to respect everyone, regardless of what you think of them. Since that day, you had become the respectful youth that your parents had taught you to be, never raising your voice and always complying to the rules.

You truly missed them.

You picked yourself up from the bench on which you were resting and walked towards your bed. Not knowing what to do with yourself, you slept.

And slept.

And slept.

It was early morning when you woke, the sun was covered by rain clouds. You yawned and stretched when a knock came from the door.

Your heart raced, and in a shaky voice you said, "come in."

A young woman around the same age as you sweetly smiled as she shut the door behind her. Judging by the crest on her pin she donned, she looked to be from Ionia. 

"I hope you like sweet rolls, they're baked fresh every morning. I've also been told you've not eaten since.. you... you know?" The woman smiled sympathetically and placed the tray on your dresser gently. You peered over at the girl from under the blanket. The sun shown into your eyes, reflecting your deepest thoughts into the open air. 

"Thank you," You said softly. The first person saw here was a brute and angry force, leaving no room for kindness, yet this woman had something about her that felt like home to you. She couldn't have been, especially if she was from Ionia, but it wasn't the backing of her homeland that made you feel this way, it was the gentleness in which she cast out.

She smiled at you again, nodding her head. You wanted to know her name, but she left as soon as the thought crossed your mind.

So there you were again, in the empty room you shared with nobody, in the same empty mind you'd been trapped in since you arrived.

You gathered the tray which was filled with fruits you didn't recognize and biscuits with a sweet glaze poured over them. You also had a cup of water, utensils, and napkins. Normally with the knowledge in the books you had read growing up, you would never accept food from a stranger in fear of it being poisoned. 

This was the exception, you were quite hungry.

As you ate, your mind was blank. 

The next day, you were visited by the same woman who had brought you your food the morning before. This time, you even smiled back at her. 

Her name was Aurora.

Aurora visited you until the week's end each morning, bringing you different foods from a different culture. Ionian, you always presumed. 

Except for this morning.

You hadn't woken up to any knocks, which this alone scared you. Instead, you woke up to an empty room.

You grazed your eyes, wiping the sleep from them. Sitting up from your previous position, you walked across the room to the bathroom. You showered and pinned your hair up into a low bun afterward as you had been doing. 

The dress you chose today was a crimson-colored dress that flowed down to your feet. Your shoulders were left bare, gathering goosebumps from simply being exposed. Your hair was dried now, and you left it all down. You looked beautiful.

You sat down at the piano bench as you did every day after breakfast and played the familiar tune you always played. You had unintentionally begun a routine that was always followed. This way, you felt like you had more of a purpose for it was better than laying around and doing nothing all day. You seemed to be waiting for nothing, so you decided it was better not to grovel. 

A change of pace and you began to turn this melancholy song into something much more. You felt like much more than this overdone tune.

As you began the crescendo, four knocks rang through your door with vigor.

_One. Two. Three. Four._

"Please, come in!" You said excitedly, in preparation for Aurora to enter your room and speak with you for hours. 

Instead, you were greeted with that same intrusive mask you'd wish you'd never see again. Your eyes widened, and you rested your hands on your lap. You no longer wore that same grin you had a few seconds ago.

"I must admit that it was a rather droll performance, but don't worry dear, within due time you will make the sweetest melody," It said, tilting it's head at you. Taunting you. He had been listening to you.

You said nothing, turning your head back to the stagnant piano keys. 

"Nothing to say? Disappointing." Your blood boiled. No longer stricken with sadness, but instead, a fit of intense anger filled your thoughts.

"What am I to say to you, Demon? You killed my family and took me." You gritted your teeth, spatting hatefulness. He chuckled, moving closer to you.

"Demon, you say? _I_ am the beacon of _creation_ and you, my dove, would be nothing if it were not for me." Dull, empty eyes stared into yours, and it scared you. Your fists clutched at your sides.

"I gave you purpose," He drew his hand to the edge of your bedframe and gathered stray bits of dust on his fingertips. His gaze rested on the gathered bits and rubbed his pointer finger and thumb against each other. He looked back at you. "You will come with me tomorrow morning and serve it well, for I will give you a performance you'll remember." He smiled under his mask. 

You shook your head, "No, I won't go anywhere with you. You're not a beacon of creation, you're a mark of death." To this, he got even closer. So close, that you could smell the fragrance he used. A mix of teakwood and a hint of gun powder, but there was something else. 

"Silly girl," He snarled. "You _will_ go." He ordered, wrapping his fingers quickly around the base of your throat and squeezed. You choked on a breath and looked away from his eyes. You felt them burning holes through your skin. "In time you will learn that death is beautiful just as I did," He finished, finally letting go of your neck, which left you breathless. 

"Are you going to kill me?" You asked like a child, catching your breath and fixating your gaze on his shoes. You knew what the answer was.

"Yes." He answered, turning around to face the door.

Without thinking on it, you grabbed your dinner knife from the night before and quickly ran at him. Your sudden footsteps must have made quite the racket because as soon as you were nearing him, you felt a cold metal object come into contact with the middle of your chest. You gasped loudly, immediately dropping the object which felt so foreign in your grasp. You didn't know what you were thinking, and to be frank, you weren't.

He quickly grabbed your right arm and spun you around, holding his free arm tightly across your chest, keeping you locked against him in this position. Your back was now in direct contact with his chest, you faced the bench where you had just sat. You felt the coldness of his armor permeate the surface of your dress, but then it was gone. His other arm grabbed your free arm and held it against your own back with his body. He held Whisper to your spine, holding you like that. 

"Not yet, my dear, we've only just begun." He whispered into your ear. He was extremely close to you. You closed your eyes, wondering what it would be like to die by Khada Jhin's hands.

He threw you back to your bed and swiftly left the room.

Flowers. He smelled like flowers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> how are we liking so far? please do let me know because i made this for my own entertainment to be honest with you and now i see that it's actually being like... read.... and i didn't even think anyone would click on this loool. but yes please let me know because i see u reading.


	5. Act II. Scene I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You go to Jhin's performance, and along the way, you discover some things about him.

This morning, you awoke with a fiery spirit. Days ago, even last night, all you wanted to do was speed up his process of killing you. You couldn't begin to think about living the rest of your life, you felt no purpose anymore.

Today was different. You wanted to survive.

You showered quickly, if you were to live on the streets you figured you should at least relish a warm shower while you still had it. Opening the dresser, you put on a pair of olive-colored khaki pants that you put a black long sleeve shirt over. You put a zip-up hoodie over it for the nights when it got cold, and a pair of boots you found in the large dresser that held your dresses. 

You put the hood over your head and peered out of the window next to your bed. There was a window right underneath yours, so you would have to work carefully if you wanted to leave undetected. It was about three floors tall, it would be a challenge. 

Sighing quietly, you retrieved all of the sheets that covered your bed and began your work.

Dawn was just starting to break now, and your time was running out. If you wanted to leave, you would have to do so that instant.

You threw the tied up sheets out of the window now, careful to not let it hit the window underneath yours in fear of it being occupied. It was still wet outside, it had been raining since you got here. 

Taking one last look at the room you hoped to never step foot into again, you set your foot on the edge of the window sill and held on tightly to the makeshift rope. 

Then you heard the four knocks. 

It was so early, why was he awake? More importantly, why was he coming here? 

You began your descent quickly, praying that some small part of him wouldn't come in anyway if he hadn't given him permission. 

Your heart shattered when you heard the door open, and his threatening chuckle echoed through your now empty room. You made eye contact with him when he peered over the window and saw you halfway down.

"Now where did you think you were going?" Jhin's sultry voice spoke to her. He started pulling on the sheets to bring you back up, but you kept descending, quicker than ever before. Your heart thumped through your chest, and your hands hurt from the amount of pressure you were putting into them. You knew you either had to let this monster pull you back through the window into your own beautifully decorated cell, or drop and get as far away as humanely possible. You chose the latter. 

"Out." You smiled up at him and let yourself fall to the ground.

Your knees gave out when you hit the ground, painfully you fell back onto your backside. They weren't broken, but you were in a lot of pain. You quickly brought yourself up from the ground, both ankles felt like they were on fire. 

Still, you pushed on, knowing this was your only escape. With every step you took, everything told you to turn back. No. You were stronger than you thought. 

You were in the tree line now, and you knew it would be difficult to find you with the forest being so lavish and rich with vegetation. You ran as far as you could, but you needed to stop for air and to rest your ankles.

You could already see they were enflamed, and there would be some bruising eventually. You sat against a tree that wasn't facing the building you were held in to better hide yourself. 

You breathed in the calm forest air, finally being able to catch your breath. You couldn't believe what you just did. You prayed he didn't care that much to come and find you. You yourself didn't even know where you were. You didn't even know if you were in Demacia anymore. It was silent, aside from the soft wind that buzzed your way. You closed your eyes, focusing on your breath alone. _Is this really what the Gods had planned for me?_ You couldn't have felt more betrayed by the universe. On the run from the Golden Demon. 

A twig snapped, and your head along with the sound. You focused on where it had come from, and you saw him. A few trees behind you was Jhin, Whisper attached to his hip where his hand rested. You held in your breath.

"I know you're near, my dear." He called out, not looking at where you were peering around the tree. You turned your head back around and faced away from him, still holding your breath. You knew you couldn't stay in this spot much longer, he was getting closer and closer. 

Again, you were faced with another ultimatum. Stay here and be discovered or run again. But you were so tired, you'd run so far. You knew what you had to do, and so that's what you did. 

You took off quickly despite your ankles hurting worse than before, but your will to live was stronger. You turned behind you and saw him look at you. 

"I do _love_ a chase." He took off running towards you, his long legs carrying him much faster than yours. You turned back around and tried to move faster but there were tree branches scratching at your face, roots coming up from the ground that were just begging for you to trip over. The universe was against you yet again, even in your escape. 

You weaved through the branches, cutting and scraping you through the process when you finally came to the ending of the forest. There was nothing. Plains, farmland. No houses to retreat to, no endearing neighbors to look for. You fell to the ground then, throwing your arms around your knees. Any sense of hope you had at all laughed at you, taunting you now. There was no escape.

 _Maybe if I went a different way,_ you thought. 

Khada Jhin stopped running once he appeared out of the forest and chuckled again, nearing you. Tears filled your eyes. It was all just a part of his game, you realized. If he didn't wish for you to escape, he would have barred your window. He wanted you to see the emptiness, he wanted you to see that there was nobody else. Just him. You stood up, dusting your pants off from the dirt. You didn't face him, just the vast land in front of you.

"Brains but no brawn I see. Pity. What to do with you now? You've shown that you have no perception of orders, so I suppose you leave me with no choice." He walked around you, circling your body. He picked the leaves and branches which stuck to your hair out carefully. His dark silhouette covered your view now, so you stared at his chest. He was going to kill you finally. 

He caressed the markings the sharp branches left on your face softly, gently. You sighed a soft exhale. You looked up at his mask, those dark eyes meeting yours. He raised Whisper up, and the last thing you saw was a wink, and then blackness. 

When your eyes opened, you were laying in the bathtub, bare. You turned your head, and your eyes met his yet again right next to you. This time, you weren't afraid. You more so felt numb. Out of instinct, you reached your arms to cover yourself.

"Awake, I see. You've left my canvas a mess, so I took it upon myself to fix it. No need for shame though, nothing I haven't seen before, dear." He smiled. You could tell from the crinkle visible from his mask. You looked back down, still covering yourself. There were roses in the water. 

"You changed me before." You stated softly, still looking at the water. 

"Yes." 

He took a cup from the side of the tub and resumed what he had been doing. You flinched when his hand rose by you. He said nothing. He filled the cup with the water from the faucet and brought his other hand to the back of your neck to hold, submerging your hair with the water. You let him scrub shampoo into your hair, massaging your scalp in the process. You closed your eyes. 

Jhin finished washing your hair and provided you with a towel to dry off with, and a silky gown to put on after. It was golden, and it was an off the shoulder dress. He waited for you outside the bathroom. 

You got up from the bath, unplugging the stopper. You dried off and put the chosen gown on, no thoughts prevalent in your head. It felt oddly nice to have none at all, a sense of calm in this treacherous storm that was your life now.

Jhin waited for you in your bedroom when you opened the bathroom door and looked at you for a second. Even with wet hair and a few scrapes on your face, you still looked beautiful. He handed you a pair of red shoes that dazzled against the chandelier light.

"Lovely. It's time to leave." He grabbed your hand and put a matching cloak in it for you to put on over your dress. He didn't want his masterpiece getting a cold, now. He loved the way your hair dried naturally, it was simply put, lovely. 

You nodded, remembering what he had said previously about his performance. You rested the cloak over your dress. 

"Right. Your performance." Your voice became dull.

"My performance? No, no. This is _your_ performance," He put his hand on your back and guided you out of your room. You furrowed your brows in confusion and opened your mouth to speak. "No time for questions now, we'll speak in the carriage." 

The building you were being held in was decorated beautifully, and there were people all around. You'd only met two people so far, Aurora, and Jhin. They were maids, workers, and some looked important. He led you all the way down the spiral staircase that carved out the middle of the building. It was breathtaking, the design. You were led to a foyer with a grand double door that you would only see in the richest parts of Demacia. The exit.

Outside the glass panes, you could see a horse and carriage awaiting you and Jhin. 

He opened the doors for you and helped you enter the carriage while he got in on the other side. For a monster, he was a gentleman. Not the nicest, but still, a gentleman. 

The journey began. 

"What did you mean by 'my performance'?" You asked, looking out the window. You never felt comfortable looking into his eyes, for fear they were so dull that they would suck you in and captivate you forever. You felt him shift, and speak.

"You'll be playing a piece, a mere background actor. A puppet, if you will. You will play the piano and captivate the audience, as you do. That's all you need worry about." 

"So I'm just playing a song and we're leaving?" You clarified, still confused, you turned your head to him.

He smiled your way, making eye contact of course.

"I didn't say that, dove, did I?" 

"Well... You didn't exactly give me an idea of what to expect. It just seems rather odd to go to God's know where just for me to play the piano." 

"I _said_ you needn't worry about the logistics. You're just there to play your pretty song." He snapped impatiently. He didn't have time to listen to your smart remarks and attitude, for he was the true performer tonight anyway. You looked back at the window, sighing. You wouldn't press any more on the matter, you would just do as he asked. It wasn't worth making him more upset, as you didn't really have an idea as to what would come about that. He was, after all, a demon.

You fell asleep at some point during the long ride and awoke to an abrupt stop in the carriage.

"We're here. Follow me closely." He helped you out of the carriage yet again. " _D_ _on't_ try anything stupid. I'd hate to have to end the show early to deal with _you_." He grabbed you by the cheeks and pulled you close to him.

"Of course, **_creature_**." You sneered, pulling yourself back from his hands. To this, he pushed you against the carriage forcefully and pressed himself against you with a large hand around your neck. Your head now rested against the top of the carriage. 

"Maybe, instead I cut one of your fingers off so that you may never play your instrument again. Perhaps that would deter you from treating me with such disrespect." He squeezed harder, and then let go. You choked out a quick "I'm sorry" and regained your breathing.

Still, he waited for you to walk beside him into the showroom.


	6. Act II. Scene II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You are a guest star of Jhin's performance.

You had to admit, you were feeling extremely nervous about what Jhin wanted from you. You weren't exactly afflicted by stage fright, it was more so the fear that had been instilled if you denied him something he wanted. He had proven to be quite the unforgiving one, and the last thing you wanted to do was give him another reason to want to kill you. It was pretty safe to say you didn't make it on his list of the people he'd rather spend his time with.

"Our performance begins, the stage is set. Go on." Jhin whispered in your ear with both of his hands gently pushing you towards the stage. You gulped from his sudden close range. You walked by yourself now to the center of the stage. 

"Our last performance of the night, I present to you, (Y/F/N) Uphane." At the last name, everyone in the audience seemed to have their eyes set on you. You made a face, unsure as to why anybody would really care who you were, let alone your family name. Perhaps it had something to do with the reason Jhin had killed your parents in such a violent way.

You slid the excess of your dress to the right of you on the bench and sighed a deep breath. You made eye contact with Jhin in the crowd, and with a nod, you knew it was time to start. You turned your head back to the piano.

You paid no mind to the audience now, for it was your time to shine. You rested your hands on the keys that held the first chord and started off. You closed your eyes, feeling the music take hold of you with no intentions to release you. It was a strong feeling, stronger than usual. Your fingers played effortlessly to the tune you always played. Vivid flashes of memories you'd shared with your parents mirrored themselves and meddled into your piece. Pictures of Ophelia as you remembered her repeated in your mind, remembering how it felt to be in her presence. The warmth, the feelings of it all. Then, you remembered what had happened to them, and who did. Your blood ran cold, and you played louder, harder. You played rapidly now. You were now fully invested in the music being played, not letting anything take your mind off of it.

At the crescendo, you heard a different tune playing, and it harmonized with the one you'd created. Closing your eyes, you let your melody harmonize with the unknown tune. 

For you did not hear the screams, the agony, and the sadness as guests watched their loved ones light leave their eyes, nor did you feel the thumping trampling of one other as the audience rushed out of the doors—only to be trapped in Jhin's traps. No. You stayed in this peaceful mindset with only the sound of your memories.

Only when the music stopped did you open your eyes. The first person you saw was Khada Jhin staring back at you. 

"You were perfect, darling." He told you, and you looked back to your audience to thank them, but instead, looking back at you were bodies that grew flowers and leftover ash. Vines grew out of their flesh and up the walls, their last breath had turned into lotus'. A light purple dusting covered the air, misting upwards. People clung to their loved ones, their hands connected with leaves and vines. Their faces, gone, only the buds of flowers remaining.

You couldn't breathe.

"Do you like it? You're an art lover. I know... you understand?" He put his hand on your back to comfort you. Flinching against this touch, you pulled back quickly. You looked at him with tears in your eyes.

"You... killed them all. You... made me a pawn," You started, sobbing into your hands, "they're all dead!" You couldn't look anymore. You felt sick to your stomach. At this, Jhin walked to the front of the stage.

"They have gone, now only beauty remains. Fate ends... When I begin." He bowed to his audience. You closed your eyes, burying your hands into your face. To this, Jhin grabbed your arms and pulled your weak body from the bench. You tried to get out of his touch, but only finding your body able to do so much to resist.

"Don't close your eyes! I want you to see," He put you against his chest and uncovered your hands with his own. You opened your eyes. You were met with the same scene you first saw, only this time, it felt different.

You saw a beautiful scene this time. You did understand. Instead of bodies, you saw a gracious field of flowers. Greenery you'd never seen before. It was magic. The colors were so cared for, picked so carefully for each scheme. The yellows were bright like the sun, the blues as dark as the night sky. The perfect color palette. How could you be so blind before? Blinded by your innocence, or perhaps by your cities policies. You were always taught from a young age that murder was wrong. Nothing about this was right, yet it didn't feel wrong either.

"I've cut your layers away... and underneath... revealed a light that blossoms _only for me_." He caressed your cheek while looking into your newly brightened eyes. He was right, about that light. As much as you wanted to hate Jhin, you couldn't now. You understood why he did what he did. You just wished it didn't have to be your parents and your best friend that crossed paths with the Golden Demon. You knew now that there was something about him that you couldn't deny intrigued you.

"Unfortunately we need to leave, though I do hate leaving behind my work," He held out his hand for you to grab yourself, which you did. Both of you head towards the back entrance where the horse and carriage awaited your return. He helped you up once again and entered on the other side. The driver quickly got the carriage going, and your escape was successful. 

You stared out the window, not feeling up for any sort of conversation this time. You had a lot to think about now. You had just seen dozens of bodies in front of your feet, and something changed. You were no longer bothered by this feat of his, and you seemed to find yourself embracing it, for it was true art. Not typical art, but it was art, and that in itself seemed hard to come by these days.

You slept the entire ride back. Jhin stayed awake watching your peacefulness. You twitched in your sleep a lot, he noticed. Mostly your hands. He wished he could dream, but it'd been such a long time since he had that he forgot about the concept of it altogether.

He couldn't wait until he was able to make you his greatest masterpiece. To see a face as beautiful as yours strung together in a way only he could do. The colors he would paint you, lovely. It was coming, eventually. Though this performance would take time, and a lot of time together.

Jhin woke you up with four taps against your hand that was resting on your lap.

"We're home." He said simply. You gave a sleepy nod and stretched. He came around to your door and let you out, holding out his hand for you to hold as you stepped out. 

"Thank you."

"Of course."

You smiled discreetly as you looked back at the ground to ensure he didn't see it. You didn't want him to know the way he made you feel, in fear it would give him even more of a sense of control, this time of your emotions. He was already doing it now.

He walked you to your room, a steady arm kept at the small of your back to bring you to your room. 

You didn't want to admit it, but with a single touch, he was able to send fire throughout your entire body. You didn't feel this way before the performance, and it made you hate yourself. This was the man who had killed everyone you loved. What kind of Stockholm syndrome was this, anyway?

While you entered your room, he stayed outside. 

"You can... come in, if you'd like.."

Why did you say that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was short but it is also 4 am and its literally christmas so merry christmas if you celebrate! also, the 3rd chapter i've written in 24 hours... maybe... perhaps a bit of *softcore porn* in the next chapter.... that i will with absolutely no doubt write within like 6 hours because sleep? who is she idk her. hope you enjoyed though!


	7. Act II. Scene III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Upon letting Khada Jhin in your room, you learn why your parents were killed.

Jhin smiled from under his mask and peered down at you. You held the door open for him, he invited himself in. While you shut the door behind him, he leaned against the doorframe to your bathroom. You peered awkwardly at him, already wishing you hadn't made the stupid request.

The tension in the room was suffocating, neither of you speaking. You waited for each other to break the silence. 

"I can't lie, I didn't take you for the type to be speechless," You broke it, "I'm not even quite sure as to why I asked you to come in..." You trailed off quietly. You held your hands together and stared at them as if they were going to fall off. Jhin chuckled.

"I'm not. I figured you had something to say, though." He said as if it was obvious. Oh.

Not knowing if you were breaking any boundaries or not, you got up from your bed and stood in front of him.

"Can I ask you something?" You asked, careful to not overstep. You fiddled with your thumbs nervously. You wondered if he would do something drastic to this request, maybe shoot you right there. With him, anything was possible.

Though this proved to not be the case, as he let out an affirming "Mm?". He picked up his head and patiently waited for you. You tried to figure out how to word your question, you didn't want to be blunt as it was uncomfortable for you. Crossing this line meant you would most likely get an answer you didn't want to hear. 

"Why did you... Kill my parents that night?" You asked, mentally facepalming. _So much for not being blunt_ , you thought. 

"Ah. Tell me, do you know who your father was? How well did you know him?" He answered your question with one of his own. For Jhin, every performance told a story, but not every story was deserving of performance. He knew that you would ask this eventually, but he didn't expect you to be able to take the news very well. He pressed his hands together, almost mirroring your anxieties.

"Um, he was gone a lot when I was young. I only really saw him during events my mother and I had to go to. We'd meet him there," He waited for you to finish. "I can only recall a couple of conversations we'd ever had, really.. Mostly about my future, though they never ended well." You admitted. You truly hadn't known your father well, never really knowing what he would do when he was gone. You had never put much thought into it anyway. You were fine with your father gone most of the time, your mother raised you as well as she could. She always told you he was working. Now, you were beginning to second guess her. Why would Jhin have killed him for no good reason?

Logically, he was a psychopath 

"Hm. Have you ever heard of Mageseekers?" He asked you. You met his wandering gaze and shook your head. You knew Demacia didn't like mages or anything to do with magic. You were taught from a young age that magic was the reason why things in other cities went wrong. It was uncontrollable and dangerous. 

"They are an organization built off of the hate of all things magic, you see." He stood straighter, no longer leaning on the doorframe but instead right in front of your chest. "Your father, along with your Uncle, were well-known leaders of it. For decades they've tracked down anybody who possesses some form of magic. Ancient instruments believed to be enchanted, staffs, and obviously mages." You followed closely to his story. You thought your dad was an ex-military captain. 

"They ordered public executions, killing them in front of their families, and before they killed them, they tortured them. A few weeks ago, they tracked down someone they shouldn't have. It ended poorly for the woman, as it usually does—but—this woman's father was a very powerful man with a very hateful vendetta. I was sent to exterminate the issue." He finished. 

You couldn't believe that the man you thought was someone who cared for the people of Demacia as he so claimed could do something so vile. You looked down, suddenly ashamed. 

However, you realized that a piece of this story was missing.

"Why my mother? Was she a Mageseeker?"

"No."

"Then... Why her?" You asked, your breath hitched. If your father truly was who Jhin said he was, then you supposed justice was served as much as that pained you. It pained you even more to know that your father was not who he seemed to be.

"I was told to send a message, so that I did. The Uphane family of Demacia was supposed to be no longer." He clasped your hands in his. You untangled your hands from his immediately and sat down on your bed, your hands found their place on the sides of your head.

"But why am I still here?" You spoke, your voice cracking. Your eyes glinted with tears visible from the pale moonlight shining through the window. Jhin followed you and sat next to you. 

"Your innocence was captivating. My masterpiece wouldn't be possible if it weren't for you." Voice sultry, woven with silk. His hand reached up to wipe the tears that had fallen from your eyes while the other lay rested on the weapon sat on his hip. He always held it, even if he wasn't in danger. It seemed to be comforting for him, just knowing it was there. 

You noticed his calm demeanor, and you too calmed down. His words seemed to play on your emotions.

No words were said from either of you after that. His land lingered for a few moments longer than he'd wished. When he put his hand down, you felt a terrible sense of loneliness escape you. A small sigh escaped your lips.

"I understand now, Jhin. Why you do what you do. How you see it," Your doe eyes looked at his masked ones, "It was a performance I'll never forget. I don’t know if I should thank you... But you’ve opened my eyes." His eyes closed for a second, and he smiled. Not a sickening smile as he usually wore. No, this was a genuine smile. While small, it still chipped away a shred of the armor he had up. He's always been looked at like a monster, and he knew he was. Behind the façade he held, he knew that he would never be excused for his work. Now, it felt nice to know that someone else had appreciated it.

Silence again. He didn't seem as talkative right now as he usually was. You wondered if you had said something that upset him. Your intentions were good, you wanted him to know that even if you were only in this situation because of him, it was better for him to know that you did understand his ways. At least, the best you could.

"It's late. You should sleep." He said suddenly, standing up from his sitting position next to you. You stayed put, nodding your head in agreement. It was pretty late, and you didn't know exactly what Jhin had planned for you the next day.

"Yeah, you're right." You said, suddenly feeling the lengths of your tiredness. You scooted up to the spot you slept in and pulled the blanket over your body. He opened the door and went to step out, but not before stalling when you spoke again.

"Goodnight, Jhin."

It had been four nights and three days since you last saw him. Aurora had brought your meals every day as she had before, but you weren't feeling that talkative since the performance. While you welcomed her presence, you often let her do all the talking. Besides, you had other things to think about. 

You had hoped to see Jhin again the next morning for some odd reason, but he hadn't come to your room. All you could think about was his presence. You found yourself longing for that presence one again, wishing to feel his soft hand against your face again. It had become endearing now whereas it used to just make you sick. Something had gotten ahold of you with no intentions of letting you go. It was as if Khada Jhin had his hooks right into your heart, staying there for eternity. 

After you finished your dinner that Aurora had brought you, you took your usual place on the bench of your piano. This time you didn't play the melancholy song as you often did, but instead, an upturned one. 

You wore a grin as it seemed that all the worries you held before had slipped away. 

Four knocks against the door. You knew who it was. Your smile didn't fade this time as it had before. You looked forward to him.

You stood up from the bench and quickly opened the door. 

Your smiling face met the unchanging masks and you held the door open for him to enter. He did, composing himself as he usually did. Standing tall, emotionless. 

"You're back." You stated, shutting the door behind him. He hummed.

"It appears that I am. It might be inappropriate to say, but I must say that you look rather lovely." Jhin's gaze wandered at your attire, his left hand went up to twirl a curl into your hair. You wore your hair naturally today compared to your usually sleek bun, and you wore a tan-colored slip dress that went to your feet. It cinched your waist perfectly, showing off your curves nicely. 

You blushed at his compliment, your cheeks tinted pink and your mouth stuck in a small smile. You looked down at your shoes in embarrassment. Jhin noticed this and returned the smile under his mask where he knew you couldn't see. 

"Thank you," You said, looking back up at him. "Come, I want you to hear a new piece I've made." You excitedly sat down at your bench waiting for him to follow you. When he did, you patted the surface of the spot next to you. 

He sat next to you awkwardly. You seemed to be in a good mood though, so he didn't mind.

The feeling of his leg coming into contact with yours was enough to make you feel tingles all throughout your body. Goosebumps covered your arms now, and you shivered. You wondered what it would feel like to be touched by his hands, your skin connecting with his in such proximity.

You stopped yourself right there. You didn't want to make yourself feel even more uncomfortable around him with these thoughts.

You cleared your throat, preparing your fingers on the keys. 

You played the song you had played earlier for him, swaying and humming quietly to the chords you created. The entire time you felt him observe you. He wasn't watching your hands, he was watching you. He watched every time you bit your lip, when you closed your eyes, felt when your arm bumped into his. You tried to block his gaze from your mind but it was getting to be increasingly more difficult the longer he did it. 

When the song ended, you looked at him, wondering what he thought.

"Beautiful," He whispered, but he wasn't talking about the song. He was talking about you. 

In an instant, you had been moved from the bench and now leaned against the piano facing him. Your backside turned the keys into a loud hum of strangled notes. You stared at him wide-eyed as he put one hand on your waist, the other stroked your cheek softly. Your cheeks were ablaze, and your skin was riddled with goosebumps. He was so close now that you could hear his breath hit his mask. His legs were entangled in yours, his arm still at your waist. He pulled it in towards him and held you there. Your back instinctively arched along with your neck.

"What are you _doing_ to me?" He whispered desperately, so close to your ear. You gulped. When he pulled back from your ear, he took his hand that was previously caressing your cheek and slowly dropped it to your neck where it rested. He didn't squeeze it, but the action in itself still took your breath away. 

"Nothing you're not doing to me," You spoke softly, your voice filled with a hunger that felt uncontrollable. You didn't know where this sudden courage was coming from. You'd never felt lust like this in your life. You'd never kissed a boy, never hugged a boy, you barely even talked to any boys. He moved his hand slowly, torturingly, down from your neck and caressed your shivering body. He enjoyed the fear this instilled in you, giving him a deep sense of control over you. 

"You'd better be careful of what you say, dove, or else I might get the wrong idea," He threatened. You swallowed and tried to build up the courage to respond. You feared more that he would take his away than anything else right now, and that was your main priority. You slowly took your hand away from the side of the piano and put it over his roaming hand, guiding him to your breasts. You sucked in a breath, unsure of how he'd react. When he didn't take his hand away, you spoke.

"Perhaps that's exactly what I want," You said innocently, as his hands explored your covered chest as if it were an endless galaxy of stars, and he was searching for you in it. He chuckled under his breath, and let out a very alluring hum as if he was wondering what exactly to do with you. 

He caught you off guard when he swiftly picked you up and brought you to the edge of your bed, finding his footing right between your legs. You sat frozen as his hand started from your midsection and went up from your neck where his grip held onto your chin. 

"What to do with you?" He pondered aloud. Your fingers danced along his arm while your other hand held yourself steady on the bed.

" _Make me into something greater_ ," You almost begged him.

The pit in your stomach sank when he removed his hand from your chin. He stood up straight now, your big eyes looking up to him from your spot on the bed. He straightened his clothes and cleared his throat. 

"I'm sorry." He said quickly, backing away from you. He bumped into your nightstand and knocked over a vase you had on it. He expertly caught it before it crashed to the ground and set it down. He left your room as fast as possible.

You were stunned. 

_Was it something I said?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i didn't write this earlier! as always let me know in the comments how you're liking it so far<3 and don't worry, there will be *smut* but for now we have angst and a whole lotta sexual tension.


	8. Act II. Scene IIII

The ghost of the Golden Demon haunted your room after his departure, his scent lingering behind him and the unspoken words led astray by his sudden absence. 

You lay back, stunned by what had occurred just moments ago. You didn't know what came over you. It was such a primal response that you hadn't even thought existed in you but now that you knew it did, it would be impossible to keep it at bay. You longed for the coldness of his touch.

You slowly mimicked his hand around your throat as it had just been, remembering what it had felt like. What it made _you_ feel like. 

You felt like an apprentice of his, bending at his will and shaping yourself to do as he did. It was as if you were watching yourself mirror him in a third-person experience, the pieces and fragments of your old self screaming at you to stop, but the new _you_ didn't listen to their pleas. Why should you? 

You wondered when you would see him again. You could only imagine that he would take even longer to come back than last time considering the circumstances that you'd both left hovering in the open air. In a way, you felt bad for him. 

You sighed and scooched up to your bed. It was late again, and you found yourself not tired at all. How could you sleep when you had so much to think about? Every thought you had echoed in your brain, crashing forcefully against every side of your skull. You had a headache now. How could one man consciously make you rethink every single thing you'd been taught and make little to no sense of it? Everything he did went directly against the laws of Demacia, but you supposed it didn't matter now for you were ever-changing and didn't even want to associate yourself as a Demacian anymore. 

You sat up from your position with the sudden urge to change out of the clothes you'd been wearing and slip into something more comfortable, so you chose a meticulously dark shade of red robe and a pair of black loafers. The robe was elegant, and it trailed long after your feet. It hugged your body nicely. 

You realized the first day you arrived here that there wasn't much to do in your room, though Jhin had given you a piano (which you were eternally grateful for). If you hadn't had that piano, you feared you would quite literally be doing nothing all day and night. A piece of you did wish that there was something else to do.

As usual, you took your seat at the piano bench and played something.

It was well in the night when you decided to do something that _could_ get you into trouble. However, you'd have to be caught first.

You noticed that in Jhin's sudden leave, he'd forgotten to lock the door behind him as he previously had. A mischievous grin danced on your face now, and you shut the lid to the piano and rose.

Before you were to leave, you'd need to set a few ground rules to ensure the effectiveness of this sneaky plan. You paced back and forth, thinking. You would only stay out long enough to have a quick look around, if anybody else was out you would immediately turn back, and most importantly, if anyone does see you, run like hell and deny everything. Seemed good enough to you.

You put your hand on the handle, not feeling comfortable with this freedom yet still relishing in it. You knew he hadn't intentionally left your door unlocked, but you just wanted to take a peek around if anything. You _were_ curious, after all.

Before you could second guess your decision, you turned the handle downwards and opened the door. You peered outside to make sure no one saw you and quietly shut the door behind you, careful to not make any noise.

When you turned around, you saw a long corridor that stretched left and right from your room. You realized it was not the only room that was on the floor, there was another that was a couple of spaces next to yours on the right. You decided against exploring that way for now and turned left. At the ends of the long corridors, there was an archway on each side. The archway was so beautiful, sculptures were carved into the stone. There were paintings scattered throughout the walls of this hallway. 

In the archway, you made sure to peer around yet again to ensure that nobody else was here. It led to a great hall where there was a piano in the exact middle of it around all of the chairs and tables. More importantly, you saw a figure sat on the bench. You hid behind a column and watched the figure who was about to play. 

You recognized the dark item dancing in the shadows on the figure's hip instantly. It was Jhin. You knew him to be an artist, but you hadn't really figured he would know to play the piano. Now, you felt stupid. Of _course_ he played the piano. His fingers pranced along with the keys and you noticed a familiar song echoing through the vast walls of this hall. It was the song you'd played at that performance hall nights ago. Jhin was playing your song.

With nothing but the pale moonlight coming through the countless number of windows, he looked beautiful. So serene, and so elegantly he played. He was so careful, almost afraid of ruining it.

Jhin hadn't meant to play your song, but he needed an escape from his mind. It was eating him alive, squandering any sense of his normal. He found himself never wanting to leave your presence, but he knew he had to. He wished he hadn't brought you here, you meddled yourself into his brain and this time you taunted him—no—tortured him with the memories of the softness of your skin pressed against him, your eyes he could stare at forever and be lost in. You were doing something to him and it'd changed him since you'd both gotten back from that wretched performance. You complimented his work when before all he knew himself as was a monster. For as long as he'd been doing this, he never thought he'd find a companion in someone that was going to end up in bloom, covered in the prettiest of flowers that only he could create. You'd be his greatest masterpiece, and he had quite exquisite plans for you.

You would live forever in his mind. What he longed was rather different from what you did, for Jhin yearned to hear your pleas, to see your tears, and to feel your heart break and shatter under his will when he'd release that fourth shot. It would be the most beautiful piece of art he'd ever created. With such raw emotion, there was no telling what he could learn and siphon from you. 

You steadied yourself against the column as you continued to watch and listen to the story he was telling with his graceful hands as you did. The beauty of it all was groundbreaking, and you found yourself slinking against the column in amazement. Even though his back was turned from you, you still saw the glinting of the light touch his mask. His entire body was illuminated in the light of the moon.

Your foot slipped from its uncomfortable position and hit a chair. It wobbled, and you tried to catch it but you knew you had to leave before he saw you, so you let it fall. You used it as your escape plan, as he wouldn't hear it until it collided with the ground. Your breath hitched and you made a run for it.

Behind him, Jhin heard the clattering of objects. With one swift motion, he turned around and aimed Whisper at the sound. He saw nothing but a knocked-down chair. He didn't have to think hard to know who had been watching. Instead of going to show you what he does to eavesdroppers, he chuckled slightly and stayed sat on the bench for a few minutes more. 

When you got back to your room, you shut the door behind you and practically leaped on the bed pretending to be asleep. Your heart pounded in your chest so loud that you were sure if he had come to your room he would hear it. You didn't want to make matters worse than they already were. 

Soon, you did fall asleep. Albeit accidentally, but all things happen for a reason.

Only when he was sure he could go into your room undetected did he open your door and enter. He saw a sight of beauty that would be engraved in his memories for as long as he lived. Your hair sprawled around you, your hands met at your lips in an angelic manner, and you were curled into a ball. He looked down at your peacefulness and sat on the edge of your bed. 

His hand rose up to your face and softly moved his thumb back and forth over your cheeks. His gloved hand roamed down to your lips and caressed those, too. It felt so strange for him to do this while you were asleep, but when you were asleep he didn't feel so much like a predator stalking his prey. He felt more human.

"I will make you perfect," Whispering, he promised, letting go of his hold on you. Your eyes fluttered open at the sound of his voice, and blinked gently at him, your eyelashes fluttered from the movement. Your eyes focused on his.

"Jhin?" You asked, about to sit up from your sleepy state. To this, he gently pushed down, keeping you grounded. His finger went across your lips, shushing you.

"Shh... Go back to sleep, beauty." He hushed you and continued to stroke your hair until you fell asleep.

So you listened to him—because in an endless abyss—there was only him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is quite short compared to my other chapters but im going to get started on the next one right after i post this. hope you enjoyed :)


	9. Act III. Scene I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> t.w: gory so pls if u dont like it skip from "Upon investigating the strange noises, you came to what seemed to be the living room." to "The music faded out of your head."  
> this is very v for vendetta inspired and im kind of living for it. btw here is a link to the dress that she puts on https://www.pinterest.com/pin/325244404341182636/  
> enjoy!

When you awoke the next morning, Jhin was nowhere to be seen. You hadn't expected him to be there, but a part of you wished he had even if it was unreasonable. You had a new pep in your step today, one that wasn't there yesterday nor the day before, or the day before. You got out of bed with clarity, as it had been missing for what felt like forever. Aurora came by much earlier, you slept in. She brought you fresh fruit and had been careful not to interrupt your sleep, as it looked like you were enjoying it. 

You'd had a good dream. You and Jhin spread out in a vast field of flowers, and you both spoke. Before the dream came to an end, you kissed him softly on the unmoving mask, that of which, was always smiling. 

After you ate your breakfast, you showered and braided your hair down the center into a neat french braid. You put on a tan dress with embroidered patches of tiny flowers that was quite flowy and accentuated your skin tone well. The sleeves were transparent and wrapped around your wrists. The straps of the dress were held up around your neck, and they crossed each other. It was a very refined dress, very sophisticated and it made you feel like royalty. For shoes, you put on a pair of light brown colored heels. 

As usual, your routine resumed. You played piano for a little while and even came up with small bits of a new piece.

Four knocks came at the door. You hadn't been expecting to see him for at least a week after what had happened between you and with his habits of disappearing after anything slightly uncomfortable took place, you expected this break to be even longer. Nevertheless, you leaped up and opened the door with vigor. You gestured for him to come in and once he did, you shut the door behind him. He walked to the center of your room and put his hands behind his back gracefully as he always had. You followed him.

"Hi." You said when he didn't say anything. He towered over your small frame and the mere sight of him alone was enough to make your knees feel suddenly heavy.

"I'm leaving tonight and I won't return for about two weeks. I have plans elsewhere." Your heart broke. Two weeks? What were you supposed to do for two weeks while your mind weigh heavily on the matter of him alone? You felt pathetic. All you wanted was for him to leave you alone, and now all you want is for him to stay. Every part of you clung to the idea of him. You'd become infatuated with him, intoxicated by his scent and his being as a whole.

You looked away from his eyes and stared at your hands, tears threatening to escape, but you couldn't let them. You wished them away.

His hand rose from his back and skimmed your chin, holding you like that.

"I thought you'd like to come with me, Dove." He said, and your face rose. 

"Is it dangerous?" 

"Yes." He said nonchalantly. 

"Is it always?" 

"Yes." 

"When do we leave?" 

"Tonight." His one-worded responses felt comforting. They weren't composed to make you feel like he was bothered as you initially thought, but composed to let you know that he indeed was listening to you, and answering your questions. 

Jhin wasn't going to invite you, but when he thought of how well his last performance had played out, he had other intentions. He wanted to break you, manipulate you so that your final performance would be much more breathtaking. He wished for you to live and breathe only him, hear your betrayed cries when he would make you beautiful. It would make it that much more special. To make you feel so alone, that you clung to him as your last hope. 

A piece of him knew that he would miss your presence when you were gone, and even a little tiny minuscule part of him hesitated when it came to his plan. After all, he was human. 

With that, you nodded and began packing your clothes with him still in the room. 

"That won't be necessary. I've already packed you a bag, and it's waiting in the carriage." You turned to look at him, embarrassed. You suppose that the demeanor you held around him gave him every reason to believe that you wouldn't refuse his proposal. That made you feel even more pathetic, knowing that he had picked up on your obsessive behavior. You felt ashamed that you had let him see it.

"Oh." Jhin chuckled as he usually did when you became this flustered. He offered his arm out to which you graciously accepted, clinging onto him as he had hoped unknown from you in his mind. He was your own crutch, and you leaned against him figuratively and literally now. As pathetic as it made you feel, it also felt so comfortable. He was warm against your tender skin when usually he was frigid. 

He walked you down the spiral staircase once again, and on the way, you saw Aurora. You smiled sweetly at her, but all she returned was a concerned look, frightened. You cringed at her disapproving look, suddenly remembering what it was that he does. You felt your grip on his arm loosen slightly. The way you felt towards this man made you feel sick sometimes. You continued on, his arm bringing you outside to the carriage where he helped you into. He got in on the other side as he usually did.

You couldn't help but notice that you both sat closer to each other than you had last time. 

There was a reason why he said he'd be gone for two weeks. You were headed to Ionia, you learned. He told you that there was someone there he'd like for you to meet. With this, you felt uneasy. There was nobody you knew in Ionia anymore, thanks to him. You put your doubts aside and just enjoyed his presence on the way. You both looked out of your own windows, breathing in the silence that floated in the air. You hadn't gone to sleep during the night, and it was now daytime. 

"I wanted to apologize, for the way I ran out the other night," He started, taking his attention away from the changing sights and now onto you. "It was boyish behavior, and it wasn't my intention to leave you there like... that." His words made you blush. You had remembered the emptiness of his touch and how it made you feel like you'd said something or done something wrong.

Feeling an act of sudden courage that should have been kept deep, deep, inside, you spoke. You wished that you could take it back but that act of courage had already taken on word form and was currently speaking them aloud.

"It's okay, there's always next time," You spoke, turning your head to look at him as he did you. He hummed. You didn't dare look away from him now. 

"Naughty little thing, aren't you?" He faced you now, mask inches away from your face, and still towering over you. You looked up at his peering gaze.

"So fix me." You dared, now centimeters from his mask. Your fingers trailed down his chest, waiting for a reaction. You didn't know where these words were coming from, but you suspected it was just the aura of him that radiated off of you, turning your brain into mush. That's what you thought this was. You must just be so out of your mind that you're doing things you would have never even thought of doing, saying things you'd never thought about saying. 

"Mm. I do have something rather exquisite planned for you, dear. I'd take you right here were we not in broad daylight." His words shook you, sending shivers up your spine and all throughout your body. You felt a pit bloom in your stomach. Still, you pushed your luck.

"Sure you would," You teased, thinking nothing of it. 

"Oh? I'm willing to wager that you won't speak with this magnitude of brevity in the dark of night when you're all mine." He threateningly whispered in your ear, hands now softly roaming your body in a slow manner. You gasped lightly in surprise, as the movement was so unexpected he hadn't given you any warning. It was agonizing, and you wished so badly to kiss his lips. You furrowed your brow in angst as his hands assaulted your most tender parts, painting you a crimson shade of red as he always managed to do. You writhed under his touch, letting out a short and breathy moan.

"Nothing more to say?" He played, chuckling deeply and taking his hands away from your eager body. He just wanted to tease you. Your brows knitted together again, this time in annoyance. 

"You were teasing me." You stated flatly, not finding the same amusement as him. He smiled underneath his mask and moved his face further from you. He hummed yet again, the smile still wearing on his face. 

"Mm. _Nothing more to say_?" You mimicked him this time, giggling. He laughed as well, and you both shared the most human moment you could have. A conversation that was not at all threatening, or anger-inducing. It felt nice. 

Three days later, you'd arrived in Ionia. You had to take a boat just to get to the island country, you'd never been on one before. It was late in the night now, and you had to admit, you hadn't thought Ionia to be this breathtaking. When you reached the shore of Ionia, you'd been put into yet another carriage.

This carriage stopped at a beautiful castle on the shoreline where you assumed you would be spending your next few nights with Jhin. He helped you out while the driver and the servants working there brought your bags up to your respective rooms. You never thought you'd ever be so sick of a carriage. 

Jhin walked you up to your room. 

"I'll wake you in the morning, for now, try to sleep." He told you, leaving you to get ready for bed and settle. You smiled and nodded your head, and he left without another word. 

You'd never been anywhere farther than the city of Demacia, so being on a completely different side of Runeterra was quite odd. 

You showered and changed into a nightgown, subtly missing the feeling of your old room. 

As you laid in bed, you thought of Jhin. You wished to see his face. You wondered why exactly he did wear a mask even in the comforts of his own home. Maybe he was disfigured underneath it. A bad accident? Or even maybe he was just ashamed of his face. Or, you pondered, maybe he felt like in a way, the mask was his face. 

Eh, you placed your bets on disfiguration. 

You woke up to the shaking of your body and the sound of your voice being called. You opened your eyes, watching the light pour in from the windows that Jhin was opening. You wished he hadn't done that, your eyes were burning. 

You sat up and stretched. It seemed really early.

He was calm, collected, as he usually was. 

"Get dressed, we've got a bit of a ride to go. You can sleep in the carriage." He told you swiftly, making brief eye contact with you before he left almost as quickly as he'd arrived. Another long ride? You sighed. How did he do this so often? Ride around in a carriage across Runeterra. 

Nevertheless, you listened to his directions and got dressed, leaving your hair down. 

When he came back in not ten minutes later, he offered his arm as he had previously. You accepted, and he took you to the carriage.

You fell asleep almost instantly despite the bright light of the sun shining pretty much directly into your eyes. 

Jhin tensed when your sleeping head fell against his shoulder. Unintentional of course, but it still made his insides stir. Not knowing what to do, he just tried to stay as still as possible, careful of his every move so that he did not wake you. He found that even though your touch was foreign to him, it was still quite comfortable. 

He fell asleep too, his head slumped to yours.

When you woke again, it was night time and you rested against Jhin's shoulder. Upon realizing, you immediately removed yourself, apologizing. He hummed, not really knowing what to say. He hadn't really minded it. The carriage was stopped.

"It's time to go, dear, we don't want to keep our friend waiting." Jhin smiled sickeningly underneath that mask. This surprise was for you, and he wasn't lying when he said he had extraordinary plans for you. Unknowingly, you nodded, smiling at him.

You weren't sure what to expect, as you usually weren't. Everything Jhin said seemed to have a double meaning behind him, you learned. He helped you out, taking your hand into his and leading you into a back door of some sort. 

You noticed that there were lotuses around the door that he was guiding you. You were confused when he made sure you stepped around them. The carriage that had taken you here pulled around the back of the building after dropping the two of you off. _Odd_ , you thought. Usually, the carriage stayed nearby Jhin.

 _These are not for you, not yet_ , Jhin thought as he guided you into the back door. 

What you didn't know was that earlier this morning, he had come here already. He set traps, so that no one may leave or enter unless they knew exactly where they were. He had ensured that everything he had planned would go as intended, for he didn't need any slip-ups. He hoped that he was right about you.

When you entered the house, you heard muffled noises. You shot him a confused look. As Jhin let you go, you went to investigate. He followed behind slowly, smiling.

Everything was to go according to his plan. 

Upon investigating the strange noises, you came to what seemed to be the living room. You saw five people you'd never seen before tied up to chairs. They all faced one other, two women and three men. The younger woman had blonde hair with deep brown eyes as did what you assumed to be her mother and her brothers. Their father, an older looking man, had dark brown eyes and brown hair. They cried, muffled by some sort of strong tape you'd never seen before stuck to their mouths. Jhin came out from behind you, trailing his hand around your waist as he walked in front of you. You shivered at his touch, your hand held your mouth. What was going on? 

"You see, my job is to follow set orders by a council, General, and it seems that your expiration date has just passed," Jhin chuckled, looking at the older man. You stared at him, still not understanding the meaning of this whole ordeal. 

"What... Who are these people?" You asked, voice breaking. You hoped that these weren't innocent people he planned on killing as he did before, back before he went to prison. You weren't stupid, you knew what he planned to do. You knew what those flowers outside were meant to do.

"Mm, yes. Meet General Beauregard. I don't expect you to know him off of his name, so let me tell you a story," He started, you listened, trying to drown out the voices of these poor people, "after I'd been released from Tuula, I was first recruited to avenge a certain someone's daughter in Demacia. I think you know the rest of the story, dear." He looked to you knowingly.

This was the man who had been the real reason behind the death of your best friend, and your parents. He'd ordered for a message to be sent instead of only killing those who'd killed his own daughter. This man was responsible for the death of your mother and your best friend. Your world spun, and you felt a fit of rage overtake you. Your fists clenched at your sides, you gritted your teeth. Your gaze met the Generals. 

"Yes! That's it! Remember what he did to you!" Jhin grabbed your shoulders, seemingly excited that you've gotten so upset over seeing this man. 

"Now, General. I have a serious question," He chuckled darkly, "Which of two children would you like to see live?" Confusion. You hadn't expected Jhin to hold any sort of feelings towards anything really, especially those who fell victim to his performances. Jhin nodded at you, an unspoken order, yet you followed. You tore off the tape from his mouth, waiting for him to speak. 

"Don't make me choose, please!" He begged Jhin, sobbing with the rest of his family. You didn't know what was wrong with you, but you simply couldn't feel anything but the radiating heat off of your body. You were so angry, so upset. You wanted to see him bleed, as he made your heart. Jhin stalked towards him, waited for a second, and then hit the older man with the underside of Whisper. He groaned in pain.

"Fine! Fine, okay! Please, let my daughter live. And my youngest son." His eldest son sobbed in betrayal, his wife cried as well.

Jhin smiled and nodded silently. He walked to the chosen children and untied each of their knots in a swift motion. 

The daughter ran out of the house sobbing. A part of you felt bad for his children, they hadn't really had much to do with their father's twisted ways of living. The other part wished to cause any kind of pain you could to the old man in front of you. 

So when Jhin asked you how many people does it take to deliver a message, you responded with a sickly smile, "One."

His barrel lined up with the younger son and shot him in the back. He cried out in pain, falling, but the sounds of his screams were no longer legible as the sounds he began to make were becoming beautiful. A symphony of melodies only made possible by the man in the mask. This orchestra took hold of you, engulfing you. You knew this was wrong, but it sure didn't feel like it. 

Jhin untied both the older son and the General's wife, allowing them to run. You could see they were crying, but all you heard was a symphony of agony. Another shot. Louder. 

Another one. Even louder, you could feel the crescendo coming. You closed your eyes, waiting for it.

You felt a familiar hand touch your face, you opened your eyes again.

In front of you stood Jhin looking down at you, and in his hand, Whisper. Loaded with a fourth shot.

He placed the gun in your hands.

You took it, feeling the gun's power in your own hands this time. Before, you were a spectator, but now, you were the main event. Your hands vibrated, the feeling of this power that you lacked for so long in your life swallowed you whole, engulfing you, giving you purpose. You knew what your purpose was now, it was alongside Jhin. 

The severity of the moment weighed on you, the crescendo waited for you. You knew what you had to do.

With shaky arms, you used both hands to raise the gun at the man who had ruined your life's face, your breath hitched in your throat, choking on the tears that were now falling in a steady stream off of your face. You took a deep breath. For a moment, you didn't know if you could do what he wanted you to do. 

Then you felt a pair of steady arms behind you grab hold over yours that rested on the trigger. You looked up to him, trembling, and he shushed you softly, comforting you. 

"Let's count together."

"One," You released another shaky breath.

"Two," You cried out loud.

"Three," You looked at the man's face, you saw no more tears on his face. He knew what was coming as much as you did.

"Four!" You pulled the trigger.

Petals of a beautiful lotus flower flew behind him as the bullet came into contact with the man's head. Everything moved in slow motion, the crescendo peaking.

You fell to your knees in awe of the sight in front of you. 

His face had been replaced with a breathtakingly beautiful arrangement of flowers, no longer sitting up in the chair, but rather laying down. Vines sprouted, covering his arms, wrapping and tangling themselves up onto the chair's arms in unison. A lovely shade of gold painted the floor where he landed, his last breath made real by tiny butterflies that escaped his lips. 

The music faded out of your head, and there you sat on the floor. Jhin knelt carefully behind you and picked you up like you were a wilting flower. 

"I killed him." You said calmly, looking up at him from his arms. 

"No, beauty, you saved him." He looked down at you now and carried you until you got to the carriage. He put you down, making sure you were steady before he opened the carriage door for you.

He waited, but you didn't get in quite yet.

There you stood, inches away from him. You gazed into his eyes, they didn't look so dull anymore.

You carefully put your hands around the false cheeks of his mask and placed a kiss against the unchanging lips. 

"You lied to me, Jhin." 

"Artists use lies to create truth," He responded, as you finally got into the carriage.


	10. Act III. Scene II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When your thoughts betray you, you find solace in Khada Jhin's presence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> smut warning tee hee

You hadn't spoken a word to Jhin after your kiss. Your mind was plagued with a sickly disease, and that disease had a grip on you, siphoning the likes of any other emotion from you. This disease was named guilt, you were familiar, for you had been afflicted by it before. You still felt the hold of the vibrations and evil intentions that Jhin's weapon had been spewing at you hours after you held it. Whisper had chipped away small bits of happiness you had inside of you, sending you spiraling in darkness in your own head. You never wanted to feel that way again, its magic was too much for you. 

When you finally reached the Ionian castle you were staying at for the time being, you went straight up to your room, hoping Jhin didn't follow you. 

Thankfully, he didn't.

Jhin understood that you would most likely need your space after what had happened. He knew that most people wouldn't be able to stomach the power that he held, the darkness that would consume them just like it did to him. He was, however, right about you. While he couldn't feel the emotions you felt, he could still do his best to understand them. For now, he would bear the burden of your actions so that you didn't have to. He would take the blame, because after all, he did hand you the gun.

You laid alone in the darkness for a while just staring at the ceiling. This ailment was taking an enormous toll on you, and you found yourself thinking about what you did to that man. You knew if you didn't kill him, Jhin would, so you supposed there was nothing you could do to change the outcome of his fate. You tried to remember what Jhin had said to you when he took you along for the first performance of his.

'Fate ends when I begin,' he had said to you. You didn't understand then, you tried to now. Everyone's destinies differed from another's, and there is a point where one's free will ends. The question laid in when this free will ends, when does fate start? You presumed when Jhin comes in, but no, that didn't make sense either. You pushed the thought aside.

 _You sad, empty thing_ , you scolded yourself. You tried to justify taking that man's life, but to no prevail. Your own morals forbade you from ever taking a life. It was simply the way you were created. You hoped that one day you could eventually forgive yourself, but right now that day seemed like it would never come. Every time you closed your eyes you thought of his face. You thought of how he behaved, first begging for mercy, then after, giving up. It was human nature to want to survive, but he had given up just as you had the minute you were face to face with Khada Jhin. It seemed that it was life's cruel destiny for you to also have this same fate eventually. 

You wondered if you would beg for mercy as he did when the Golden Demon eventually kills you, or if you would give up as you had in the beginning, sealing your fate to the barrel of his gun. The thought made you shiver. 

Your fingers tugged at your lips, picking off the flakes of skin you had been chewing on since you got to your room. Old habits never die. You took a ragged breath.

You closed your eyes. With every muscle in your body and whatever will you had left, you kept them closed this time, dreaming of an escape from your own head. 

But even that was impossible.

You woke up not thirty minutes later in a cold sweat. Your blankets had been kicked off of you during your short slumber (if you could even call it that). Flashes of him. This time, without the illusion of Whisper. 

They lulled you, cooed at you, mocked you. You started hyperventilating, tugging on your hair from the sides of your head. You rocked yourself, any attempt to calm yourself down. 

You succeeded eventually, the only noise in the room now was the sound of your calming breath.

You had to see him, just be in his presence for a minute. You stood from your sitting position and wrapped your robe around your waist tighter so that it did not fall off. The compression against your body felt better, a figment of your imagination pretending so that it contained all your thoughts in your own head for no one else to read. 

You left your room and walked quietly to the one across from yours. The layout was different from the one you had begun to call your home, but Jhin's room was still extremely close to yours. You waited outside his door, trying to gather the courage that had so easily slipped out earlier. You wondered where exactly it went. 

To be truthful, you were more scared of opening that door than you were of pulling that trigger. 

Opening this door meant that you would inevitably overshare your feelings and receive nothing in return, for Khada Jhin did not seem the type to want to hear your melancholy thoughts. But then, you supposed, if he hadn't wanted to hear them, why would he even have given you that gun in the first place? He knew how you felt about his style of living and while you couldn't say you were willing to share that same passion as he did, you did try to understand them. Well, to be honest, you did understand them. Slightly. 

You took a deep breath in and exhaled it after a few moments of holding it. You knocked four quick times just as he did when he would enter your room. 

You waited for a minute, and when it seemed like he was sleeping, you began to turn back to your own room. 

The door opened then, and standing in the dark doorframe was Jhin. He didn't wear his usual armor, instead, he wore a simple tunic and black pants. He did still wear the mask. Not like you had expected anything different. You wondered if he slept with it on too. 

"Sleep did not come easily for you?" He presumed. You shook your head, suddenly feeling a great deal of insecurity. Your arms crossed your chest, and you instinctively traced patterns into the skin with your nail. He held the door open for you to enter, which you did. You'd never been in his room, neither here nor the other castle. It was much bigger than yours, paintings covered the walls just as they had at home. The paintings in his room were different from the others, though. They were much more personal to him. Lotuses, butterflies, every depiction of death he'd created.

There was a mirror on the floor near his bed. It had a bullet hole pierced through it, and a black sheet covered half of it, pieces of glass lay broken around it. You noticed his gun was on the nightstand next to his bed, no longer attached to him at the hip. What looked like attachable pieces to his already fatal weapon laid spread out on top of his dresser. You shifted uncomfortably, and he noticed. Half of you expected him to not even let you in, the other half well... Didn't know what to expect.

"Art _should_ terrify. How else would it be memorable?" He always had a way with words that made you rethink your feelings. How could you be upset? It was art, after all. You let out a hum in agreement, already feeling the intoxication creep its way into every pore of your body. Your body betrayed you.

"I... I would like it if you..." You stammered. He looked at you patiently waiting for you to finish. "Do you remember what I said yesterday? About..." You trailed off, hoping he understood what you were trying to say. He let out a dark chuckle, walking towards you. He knew exactly what you meant.

"You're wondering if I meant what I said? Well, dear, it looks like I placed my bet correctly," He grabbed your chin and drew you closer to him. Your stomach did a flip, gasping at the suddenness of the action. He was right. It appeared that your brevity had indeed escaped you, as he knew you it would. You fluttered your eyelashes at him, relishing in the touch already. You could use a break from your own mind, you prayed he would take on your burdens as you did his. 

"It is, after all, the dark of night, and I always keep to my word," He removed his hand from your face and grabbed your arm. He loomed over you, pushing you onto the bed as he had the first time. He leaned over you, holding your hands down. The pit in your stomach made itself known to you now. His words delved deep into your subconscious and traversed through every thought you'd ever had of him. Your breath hitched, not sure of what to say, so you let him do the talking. 

"Tonight, you will learn a lesson on obedience, Muse," He leaned down to your ear, still holding your hand pinned to the bed, "and I'm afraid there is quite a lot to teach you," He got up from his position, and you stayed. He turned the light off. There was a bit of rustling, and then you felt his hands come into contact with your body. They roamed as if he'd never before felt the skin on skin contact before, as if he was going to shatter you into a million pieces with his touch alone. But then he spoke, and your heart pounded harder than it ever had before.

"Shall I remove your attire, then?" His mask was off. He spoke with a deep, husky voice in absolute clarity. Your mouth hung open for a second. He waited for your permission, hands hovering your midsection where the long string had remained.

"Please," you begged, desperateness washing over you. He began first untying the silk belt that lay strapped to your waist, removing it agonizingly slow. You wished you could see his face, but this was even better than you'd thought it would be. You wished for some kind of moonlight, but there were no windows present. He pulled you up into a sitting position and pushed the sleeves to your robes off gently. 

You were in nothing but your undergarments with Ionia's Golden Demon right above you. You couldn't believe what was happening, utter shock. He tossed your robe to the floor and turned his attention back towards you. His long slender fingers trailed up to your cleavage and his other hand snaked behind your back to remove your bra. With a swift motion, he caught it with the fingers that had just been trailing there. He tossed that to the floor now, scattered somewhere with your robe. 

You were absolutely entranced, silent as ever. You'd never been so desperate for a man's touch, never felt so starved before. You never knew starvation until now as you not so patiently waited for his touch to resume its haunting stride along your body frigid body. All you had left on was your underwear. 

You reached out for his hand in the darkness to put it back on your body, but he grabbed yours with his other and lowered it back down.

"Maybe a lesson in _patience_ as well?" He hummed. _Damnit_. You whimpered quietly, only craving his touch. You laid there helplessly, your legs were trapped under him, and your arms covered your body to save whatever dignity you had left.

Jhin picked you up effortlessly, putting you in his lap as he laid back against his bedframe. You were now on top of him, your core sat directly on top of his groin. There was something about it that ignited you about him being clothed while you were naked on top of him. His hands started on your cheeks, where he cupped them. 

"If only you could see what you'll become," He whispered, bringing his large hands down and over your breasts. He caressed them, tickling you in the process. When they went over your nipples, you let out a breathy moan. Your back arched, rubbing against his pants.

Jhin enjoyed having this control over you, it made him feel things he hadn't felt in such a long time. He spent so much time caring about his art that he'd neglected his own needs as well, forgetting what it had felt like to be with a woman. It'd been so long, years and years of loneliness, only having his work to obsess over rather than anything else. It felt so good to be able to finally touch you. He wanted to watch you willingly mend and shape yourself to his will until you were putty in his hands. It was now that he would begin the process of his masterpiece, _you_. 

His hands left your breasts and trailed down to your stomach where he felt where your waist caved in, where your ribs were, your skin felt like it was on fire wherever he touched. 

Then he wrapped his arms around your back and pulled you so that you were centimeters from his unmasked face. You craved to feel his real lips.

"I must warn you, darling. I like a violent composition," Right after the words left his mouth, he brought his lips to yours forcibly, sucking on your bottom lip. They were so soft, and it drove you mad. You whimpered again against his lips, and brought your hands up to his face, feeling his strong cheekbones, his chiseled jawline. Your fingers embedded themselves into his hair, it was longer than you'd thought it'd be, it was wavy, soft. If he was bothered by your touch, he didn't show any protest. 

Your tongues danced with each other, and his hands engulfed your body, flipping you so that he was once again on top of you and you under him. He briskly broke the kiss to slide your underwear off. You both caught your breath during this quick period of time.

You were now completely nude, all your clothes stayed in their places on his floor. He resumed the kiss, more animalistic than the first time they crashed against each other. You had a hard time keeping up with his haste. Your hands wandered his body now, or, at least tried to before he used one arm to pin your hands above your head. You whined, feeling the unfairness. 

"Hush. Patience is a virtue." He nearly growled, making you gulp. Instead of returning his lips to yours, they connected with your jaw. He made his way down to your breast, leaving a methodical trail of soon-to-be bruises in his mouth's wake. You writhed under his touch once again as he sucked and bit your tender skin, leaving the entire area ablaze to the cold air. As he went further down, the pit in your stomach grew bigger, unavoidable. The things he was doing to you.

"Keep your arms where I leave them." He ordered, taking his own away. You kept your arms above your head, locked in one another.

Finally, he got to your sex and invited himself to do as he pleased. The feeling of his breath alone was enough to make you want to scream in pleasure. He assaulted your most tender area with his mouth, leaving you a stuttering mess. You cried in pleasure, gasping. You couldn't help but brush your fingers through his hair.

He stopped, taking the time to put your arms back to the spot they rested before you moved them. You didn't have to see him to know what facial expression he was making, you felt his gaze burning holes through yours. 

"Keep your _arms_ where _I leave them_ ," Jhin said through clenched teeth. You regained your breath, whispering a quick apology. 

He resumed yet again, this time bringing you to the brink of an orgasm. Your legs shook, his strong hands steadying them. You moaned loudly now, about to let go when he stopped suddenly.

"Wh-What are you doing!" You exclaimed, the pit in your stomach ached now. Tears streamed down your face, your voice broke. 

Jhin wore an evil smile on his face in the darkness. He stood up and took off every piece of clothing he had on. You heard nothing but more rustling. You were left feeling cold and empty now, longing for his touch yet again.

"Teaching you a lesson in obedience, did I not say that already?" You went silent. Oh. Right. You hugged your knees, ashamed. The bed shifted once more. 

"Come here," He ordered. You moved closer, obeying him. You felt him graze you, your eyes widened. He took control of your hands and rested them on his shoulders. You caressed them, his skin warm, soft. You exhaled. There were a few raised patches of skin, scars, you presumed. Your hands trailed down to his chest now, feeling the muscles contract against your touch. He was more muscular than you expected, you could feel the strength he held. He held your hands now, folding them together.

"Sit." You did, nervously, never having done anything like this throughout the entirety of your life. 

You felt his hands raise your bum up and then down onto him. You winced, the pain was so uncomfortable. He moved slowly at first, then began to pick up his own pace. He was okay with doing all of the work for you _—for now._

You moaned, loudly now. The pressure was beginning to build, a pressure you never felt before. It was so strong, and it was making you behave in ways you'd never before. His name became a prayer to you, and his groans were godlike in your ear. 

Without releasing you from his hold, he put you into a missionary position now, taking complete control over your entire body.

"How close you are to divinity," He told you, picking up his pace and with his free hand, wiping your hair stuck to your forehead. It was a breathtaking sight for him, seeing you so desperate for him, writhing underneath him. Begging for any release as he previously denied you.

"Please, Jhin, please!" Your pleas hadn't gone on deaf ears, because Jhin began to stutter on top of you. He was close too, the sound of his name on your tongue left an inescapable amount of pleasure building up in him too. 

"Sing for me!" Whimpering, you only spoke his name mixed with incoherent moans. Your legs shook uncontrollably now, a feeling engulfed you and it was riveting. Your ears rang, and you couldn't hear anything until the pressure had gone.

You'd both finished, and you were exhausted. You laid underneath him, naked, nearing a deep slumber. 

The last thing you remembered was him picking you up and putting his duvet over your trembling body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> holy shit i am so horrid at writing sexy time wow. hope u enjoyed nonetheless


	11. Act III. Scene III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Jhin go to the Spirit Blossom festival in Ionia together. You discover he is not the type to have many friends, despite his very obviously warm personality.

The next morning, Jhin was nowhere to be seen. He had left a dim light on so that you could see when you woke up. Your clothes that had previously been scattered across were now neatly folded at the end of the bed for you. You smiled at this endearing act, but perhaps you had also set yourself for the bare minimum when it came to him and his actions.

You sat up in his bed, stretching as you did every morning. His side of the bed hadn't been slept in, pillows were still neatly piled where they had been before, the blankets, untouched aside from you. You wished he would've stayed, you never meant to make him uncomfortable in his own room. You would've gladly slept in yours if you noticed he was less than willing to share the bed with you, but he hadn't shown any protest. But then you supposed he was too much of a gentleman to even digress. 

You stood up, suddenly feeling like an intrusion to his safe space. Slipping your clothes on, you opened the door to his bedroom and flocked to your own.

You wondered if things between you would be awkward now. Perhaps you hadn't lived up to his expectations. Maybe he even left you here and went back to the other castle. These bustling questions and feelings of self-doubt bounced around your head. You wished he hadn't had such a hold on your emotions as he had, but he did. You felt like roadkill, and he a vulture, circling you, waiting for the perfect time to pick you apart. 

An immense wave of sadness overtook you, and you laid in your own bed with the covers pulled up over your head. You felt so pathetic, why would he even want you as you did him? His art was his passion, not you. How could you be so blind? His sophisticated words and etiquette had taken control over your unkempt ones. You could never be good enough for him. Part of you wondered why you were still even here. 

But then a knock came in a set of fours and your brain went silent.

You said nothing. You heard the door open and a heavy set of shoes enter, stopping at your bed. _Come in_ , _I guess_.

"Are you hiding from me, muse?" His muffled voice spoke from above you. You put your slender fingers over the top of the blanket and put it over your nose and mouth so that only your eyes were visible.

"No." 

"Liar." Just like that, your brain had completely gone to mush under his spell. You stifled a smile, but he noticed the downturn of your eyes. He gently took the blanket from under you. Your hair was a frizzy mess and you had a few dark circles under your eyes, and Jhin only saw opportune. 

"How was your sleep?" He asked. As usual, Jhin had not. Instead, he stayed up all night planning his next piece. 

"I slept well. I think I had a good dream but I can't really remember it," You mentioned, pondering for a few moments. Jhin hummed. He sat down on the edge of your bed, careful to put some space between the both of you. 

"I assume you didn't come in to hear about my sleeping habits," You stated.

"Ah, yes. I have somewhere to be today and I won't return until well into the night," He told you. You noticed his vagueness. While it was meant to not overwhelm you, you found a certain disdain in his words.

"Where are you going?" You inquired, curious. He chuckled.

"Wouldn't _you_ like to know?" 

"I would."

"I have an affair that requires my choreography." He said. So he had another job to do. You chewed on your lip anxiously, and without a moment's hesitation, you followed up.

"Can I come?" You asked, your eyelashes fluttered with the movement of your eyes. Jhin smiled under his mask. 

"I didn't think you would want to again after last night," He hummed, eying you slyly. A double meaning.

You blushed in embarrassment, your cheeks turned a bright shade of red. You put your hands over your face and leaned back against the pillow, mortified.

"That is _not_ what I meant and you know it."

Jhin was glad you were joining him today, it meant his plan was working. You were falling into his trap. He knew that you had the passion in you, you'd seen what he sees. You knew now that there was a certain beauty in death and it's what he wanted for you. To see it how he did, so you would welcome it when it inevitably happened to you. 

Now he would need to see how you reacted tonight, to be sure that his plan was really working. He toyed with you, letting you believe in his actions and his words. 

Jhin had told you that after his show was over, you would return home together. You packed up your things and they were put into the carriage that would presumably take you to the location you were headed and away from Ionia entirely. 

Now he waited for you outside the carriage to help you in as he had many times before. You gladly accepted his help, thanking him as always. 

He got in on the other side and settled in. 

You noticed something hanging off the other side of his trousers. Daggers. Four slender knives were attached to his pants, each etched with differing beautiful designs at the hilts. 

One had butterflies, then flowers, then what looked to be ashes, and lastly a tree. 

You remembered seeing these designs painted on the canvases in his room. They were gorgeous, no doubt prevalent. This scared you. 

You'd only ever seen him kill with his gun, which seemed to be his most used weapon. Your mind wandered. If he had more weapons, you assumed there would be more than just four people affected by Khada Jhin's performance tonight. 

You cleared your throat and peered out of the window, turning your attention anywhere else but those knives attached to his hip. He paid you no mind, leaving the trip in comfortable silence.

When you arrived, you noticed that there were a lot of people out and about. It seemed to be a sort of festival. There were flowers that bloomed in the archways, welcoming all who were to step foot into the area. 

It was so beautiful. Couples kissed under the moonlight, children chased each other around the fields of what seemed like endless flowers. You couldn't help but wonder if your life would have turned out like this were you not taken by Jhin. 

You wondered if you would have found someone to love you as much as you did them, maybe even eventually have children. The thought seemed foreign to you now, all you wanted to do was stay near the masked man before you. You supposed this made you an idiot, as you knew he would never be able to reciprocate the same feelings you had for him. You found yourself never even wanting to tell him in fear he would see you as weaker than he already had. You felt the need to protect some of your dignity. 

The carriage stopped now and you opened the door for yourself. You wanted to explore, but you knew that it would be better if you did not leave Jhin, especially now that you knew his plans were to somehow cause a ruckus here. A part of you felt sad that such a beautiful night had to come to an end, wanting to warn people as they passed you to get out while they still can. But the majority of you couldn't wait for the show to start. You wished this part didn't exist in you, but after you killed that man, you feared it would never leave. It had awoken something deep inside of you, and Jhin knew it too. 

What more could you give a person than a beautiful death worthy of performance? 

Your thoughts were interrupted when Jhin came to you, offering you a cloak. He put one on as well, covering his head with the hood. You assumed that he needed it to hide from onlookers, and also hide you. 

"You know that your mask kind of draws to the attention that you may or may not be the Golden Demon, right?" You found yourself asking, a smug look on your face. 

"Erasure is the pinnacle of art, my dear. Would you be more afraid of a man in a mask or a man with none?" He questioned, turning his head to the side. You blushed.

"A man with a mask," You whispered. 

"Mm. So you see? There is no drama in a peaceful death." You nodded. His tactics were odd, but you dared not question him any further. 

"Besides, it's important that they know who I am. I am hoping to see some of my oldest friends tonight." You hummed, biting the inside of your cheek. 

"Shall we look around?" He offered his arm, looking down at you. Your face lit up with excitement, and you feverishly wrapped your arm around his. 

As you walked, you saw beautiful arrangements engraved in wood. Food vendors lit up the pathway with their hanging lanterns, as well as lanterns that were being released into the sky. People wore bright colored kimonos, they stood out in the crowds. It was truly a breathtaking sight.

"Look! A dove!" You pointed at a white bird perched on a wooden column attached to the dock to your right. There were multiple ships docked there, big and small alike. The water reflected the floating lanterns, the sight was otherworldly. Magical. 

He hummed in response. You looked at him. He seemed anxious now compared to his normally so calm demeanor. You furrowed your brows.

You were about to stop and ask him what was wrong when he grabbed your hand and started walking faster than before. 

"Jhin? What is going on? Why are we moving so fast?" His gaze bounced behind him and to your left. 

"They're here earlier than I originally anticipated. You need to get to the docks, _now_."

"Who? Your friends? Why are you running from them?" You spewed your confusing questions at him. He looked at you quickly, not saying a word, and pushed you off gently towards the docks. You were dumbfounded when he left you. _What just happened?_

You watched him nearly sprint back to the crowd, disappearing into it. 

Sighing, you sat on the stairs you stood on seconds before. You waited for about twenty minutes before decided you would go looking for him.

But then you heard the music begin. His music. 

Turning back around to the crowd, you felt the entire grounds shake underneath you.

The flowers that had been delicately arranged in a beautiful manner now became even more extraordinary. They flew through the sky, landing softly on the water behind you. In a trance, you stared in awe at the sight before you. You heard the sound of Whisper in the distance, booming and echoing in the previously calm night sky. Fireworks cracked above you, reflecting on the water. A beautiful sight.

You looked at the crowd now.

Vines covered the grassy area, flowers bloomed out of their chests. As usual, you noticed that the color contrast was breathtaking. Butterflies flew around their unconscious bodies. 

Who wouldn't want to die a beautiful death by his hands? How could they see the man you had begun to care so much for as a monster? How could you have called him that? 

The sound of your name had broken you out of your entranced state, and you were forced to look up. 

Seemingly in slow motion before you, Jhin sprinted in your direction. Not far behind him, another man in a mask. He was chasing Jhin. In the spot where there was room for his eyes, a red light reflected instead. He wore so much armor, it covered every inch of him. It was silver and red. In his arms were the sharpest blades you'd ever laid eyes on.

Your eyes widened at the sight in front of you. 

In a last-ditch effort to escape the man chasing him, Jhin threw you his gun. It landed right at your feet, for you were not exactly ready to catch it. 

You picked it up quickly, realizing the severity of this issue.

With unexpected speed, you aimed it at the man behind Jhin, your finger resting on it's trigger.

You were ready. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not very long but its a chapter. probably wont update again until after new years but hey zed.  
> also i am most likely lying because writing is all i do.


	12. Act III. Scene IIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If given a chance to take a shot at the sole person who had stolen everything from your life, could you? Or, would you instead shoot his foe?

"Don't shoot!" The man behind Jhin yelled desperately, putting his hands up in the air in surrender. His voice was masked, eerily deep. He stood still as can be with the barrel of a gun staring back at him. You adjusted your fingers, trying to find a more comfortable grip on the weapon. Now that you aimed the gun at this man, Jhin was able to walk behind you. He never once took his eyes off of you.

 _Were_ you ready? You didn't know this man, you didn't know what he was capable of. You didn't know what he's done, unsure if he was innocent or not. How could you be ready? How was one ever supposed to be ready to kill another human?

 _It doesn't matter who he is, you killed the General and you liked it_ , a strange voice whispered in your ear. Mocking you. Your mind vibrated with a piercing frequency, immediately giving you a headache. You held the gun steady, despite the growing pain in your skull. 

"Do you know who this man is?" He questioned you, hands moving to his sides slowly. You shakily nodded in response, your fingers still pushed against the trigger. Your throat felt dry. Every shaky breath felt like razor blades, chafing, and cutting into you. You didn't want him to move anymore in fear that you would be forced to shoot him. 

_You can do it, kill him!_

_Kill him! Kill him! Kill him! Kill him! Kill him!_

The words reverberated around your head, you felt like you were going to be sick. Your headache worsened with every passing second you stood there with Whisper in your hands.

"Then you know what kind of monster he is, don't you? How many he's killed?" Jhin glanced at you from his position behind you, moving in closer towards you. He tried to read your expression. 

The power you held locked in your hands was unlike any other you'd ever felt before, not like the man you'd killed before. This was different. In your heart, you were protecting the man you cared for. However, the tiny sliver of common sense left inside of you, small or not, begged you to turn the gun around and aim it at Jhin. This was the man who had killed your family, your best friend. He took away any shot of a normal life that you would've been able to live. He ruined your life as much as a person can.

But he also gave you a purpose. To be by his side, to help him live out his passion. Was it fair to put that on you? You were, after all, an accomplice to many, many murders.

You could've run away many times. You had chances to kill him before, like when he'd given you Whisper the first time. You could've turned it on him then.

Your feelings were clouding your judgment on both ends. You'd never felt so confused in your life. 

Jhin now became unsure if you would be able to shoot the man or not. Maybe he _was_ wrong about you. Maybe you could never be like him. You would never be able to kill without guilt, you would always have your doubts. Really though, that's not what he wanted. He wanted you to see how beautiful it was to take the life of another and create something bigger in its place. That way when he eventually did the same to you, you would understand. Only then would you understand what your purpose really was, and how it played in Jhin's eyes. 

"Please! Stop talking, please!" You trembled, the pressure was beginning to eat you alive. This sickening headache was controlling you now, and your eyesight was beginning to feel a bit cloudy. You felt like you were going to pass out right there. The man before you went silent.

Khada Jhin decided then he couldn't give up what he'd been working so hard to do. He could feel Whisper's power take its toll on you, manipulating you just as it did him for all of these years.

Jhin smiled under his mask eerily. He whispered in your ear soothingly.

"Shoot him, dove." And that you did.

The shot kicked your arms back quite a bit, more than it ever had before. You blinked. You had only hit him on the shoulder blade.

A small part of you felt happy you had missed his heart.

Why did you do that? After all of the back and forth in your brain. You could've escaped his hold on you, could've lived your life freely. You could've saved the world from Ionia's Golden Demon. He'd terrorized all of Runeterra, and you just ruined your only shot at killing him now. 

All because he told you to.

You handed him his gun back while the armored man dropped to his knees in pain. Jhin hastily pulled you up into the boat and held you close to him. The rope untied, and the boat was released from the dock.

His hand caressed your hair, cooing you as if you were a child who had gotten hurt. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw another man in armor go to the one you'd just shot. The calming waves and Jhin's hands on you were enough to let you close your eyes. 

You focused on your breath as it hit against his chest. You stopped hearing the ocean's waves and listened to the heartbeat in front of you. 

"You did so well." You breathed a sigh of relief. You thought he'd be upset with you because you didn't kill that man. 

Jhin pushed you off of him gently and your eyes met his masked ones. He brushed back a piece of your hair, putting it behind your ear. The serenity of this moment made your heart swell. 

"Who were they?" You asked, voice soft as ever. For the first time in a while, your mind relaxed. No thoughts, no headaches, and no intruding voices. Calm.

"The Kinkou. Zed and Shen. They've been after me for a _very_ long time." He answered, still resting his eyes on you. You were glad he didn't keep this information from you as you had expected he would. You hummed. 

"Which one did I shoot?"

"Zed." 

"Will he come after me, too?"

"Not you. Me." You hummed again. 

"I'm tired." He said nothing. He brought you to a door at the end of the boat where there was a room with a bed inside. You thanked him and laid down.

Sleep welcomed you after that.

_"Will it hurt?" You asked the masked man standing before you. His looming height cast a shadow upon you, blocking you from any other light if it was present._

_"Art is worth the pain, dear." You frowned. You didn't want to die. You still had so much more to be, so much more to do, and so much more to see. You wanted to have children one day, get married, grow old, and die a peaceful death._

_"I don't want to die, Jhin." You cried softly. He bent down to your level and brought his hand to your cheek. His thumb soothed your rosy cheeks, lit with fire. A burning desire to survive, the same that you had felt all that time ago when he'd captured you first. You wanted to kick and flail around, try to take his gun and use it against its owner. You wanted to run away, far away so that he may never find you._

_Another part of you wanted to get it over with. What did you have left? Nothing but a broken dream that complimented your broken heart. You thought he could love you just as you did him. All the man before you had was loneliness, emptiness, and a burning passion._

_You knew this day was coming eventually. You knew from the moment he'd taken you along with him._

_The man before you held your face in his hands. You wondered how someone so empty inside could make you feel so loved, even if you knew it wasn't true._

_"You fear erasure but that's why I chose you," He softly sighed. You held his hands in yours, bringing one up to press against your lips. "I love you, Jhin," you wanted to say, but you couldn't bring yourself to open your mouth. Instead, you sat in the same corner you'd been in, holding onto the man who was about to kill you._

_Maybe you were ready to die._

_For Jhin, you would die two hundred times over if he'd asked you to._

You sat up from your previous sleeping position, holding your chest. Your face was wet, and you felt a heaving pain rip through your chest. 

This is what true heartbreak felt like. You'd never been in love before, but your dream had surely just proven it to be true. You loved Khada Jhin. You loved a psychopathic killer. A cold-hearted murderer.

You sobbed and sobbed for what felt like hours until nothing more came out. 

How could you fall in love with someone so horrible? Someone who surely would never and could never feel the same towards you. How could your own heart betray you like this? You'd never felt more alone in the world than you did right now.

You wished more than anything that Ophelia was here to console you, but then, even if she was, this whole situation would've never happened. 

His touch was like drugs in your veins, and you, a grateful addict. His voice comforted you and soothed you, when before it had brought you to fear. You felt that same fear now, only this fear was different.

It was the fear of losing him. Losing his touch, losing his voice, losing his scent. Your mind was plagued with the most sickeningly beautiful images of him. 

Deciding you couldn't be in that bed any longer, you stood up and opened the door. 

At the sound of the door creaking, he turned from his standing position at the stern of the boat and made eye contact with you.

You walked to him with only the soft waves crashing against the ship on your mind. He watched you silently.

You rested your arms against the guard rail and looked out into the ocean while his gaze was fixated on you. 

"When will you kill me, Jhin?" You kept your eyes on the calming water.

He said nothing, turning to copy your position.

You both stayed there a while, enjoying each other's company. 

You went to turn to him to ask another question, but before you could, he'd grabbed you by your waist and pulled you against him. 

His hand went up to his mask.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im really sorry that this is so short. happy new year <3 i've been trying to pace myself better so that i don't get too tired out from writing so quickly and as much as i have. quality over quantity i suppose.


	13. Act IV. Scene I

The Golden Demon had never shown his face to anyone. Never was he self-conscious, it was all a mere part in the performance. He was no more the face behind the mask than he was the mask itself. 

He himself was unsure as to why he was taking it off to begin with. 

Perhaps it was the sharp pang sent to his cold, detached heart. He had never denied your beauty, only thought of what he would do to make it last forever. He wanted to always remember your face as you looked right now, painted beautifully in the basking glow of the moonlight. Many believed that Khada Jhin was devoid of such feelings, some even going as far as to believe the organ in his chest was simply vestigial. How could he share the same feelings as those whose lives he'd taken?

“Beautiful,” You gasped, instinctively reaching out to him as he did to you. The eyes you once declared as dull, uninviting, were now an entrancing hue of golden brown, honeylike. You fell into his trap immediately. His dark brown hair had a softness to it, falling just above his ear in wavy locks. He was so well-kempt, no facial hair grazed his soft skin. Stray strands of his hair framed his face well. The same pink lips you'd kissed in the dark were plump, parted slightly. His jawline was strong and set. He was sculpted by the angels, for your hands only. 

He instead held your hands in his before they could reach his face. You frowned, desperate to feel him for real like you'd wished.

Jhin dipped down to you, placing his lips against yours so softly you thought you would melt under his touch just as you did when you'd laid in his bed with him. The thought made you blush.

As his lips moved against yours, you couldn't help but feel a wicked pain in your chest, blooming and spreading all over your body and mind. You wished he didn't make you feel the way you did. You wished you weren't an open book for him to read so easily. Controlling your emotions had never been a simple task for you. 

You hadn't even realized you were crying until he pulled away from you, concerned. His thumb brushed away the stray tears that had fallen, and his honeyed eyes met your soft (E/C) ones.

"Why are you crying, dove?" You sucked in a breath, turning your gaze from him to the now overlapping waves in front of you. 

"You, Jhin," You sighed sadly, looking away from his gaze. He didn't look away from you.

He waited for you to continue. Never once did you look back at him.

"You've left me completely helpless in my head, and my heart. Your touch alone drives me to behave in ways I didn’t know I could, your voice soothes me, scaring off what lives in the deepest, darkest, parts of my mind. You make me feel things I didn't know I could feel." You paused, trying to regain control of yourself. Your emotions spilled in front of you like a glass full of water tipping over the edge. "You've made me an accomplice, you've turned me into a fool, but the worst part is that I don't hate it, and I should, I should hate you!" 

You finally looked at him, your voice broken and raspy. 

"But I can't hate you, because  I am so hopelessly in love with you, and you'll never be able to return that same feeling to me." You let your tears roll freely now.

Your shaky hands covered your face in embarrassment. You couldn't believe you just let him hear such vital and sensitive information, it was meant to stay in your heart where you knew he couldn't access it unless he himself had the key to the lock named 'Jhin.'

"Please, understand that there is nothing for me in life but this," He turned, looking back out to the water. "I must fill this emptiness." He whispered away from you.

“You don’t have to do the things you do, Jhin!” You cried desperately, holding his free arm to your chest. A piece of you knew deep down that he would never stop performing. “We can-” He cut you off.

"(Y/N), I am a slave to this passion." He said, harsher this time. He ripped his arm from you and set it on the railing of the ship. Your heart wrenched, a deep ache that you knew now would never be satisfied if you couldn't have him.

A moment of silence passed. 

“Fine, then,” Anger and hurt coursed through your veins, demanding to let their presence be known. Tears spilled over the edge of your lids, your vision got blurry. “If I’m to be here with you until you get bored of me, you will not touch me the way you do, you will not speak to me the way you do, you will not bring me wherever you go," Your voice shook in heaving sobs as you prepared yourself.

"I-I will feel your lips no longer, I will keep my heart locked away from you.” You pushed yourself away from his presence forcefully and turned to the door that you had just come from earlier. Your hand rested on the handle now.

“Goodnight, **_Demon_**.”

Before you shut the door, you looked back at him once more.

 _Beautiful_.

Jhin stayed where you left him in shock. 

Never had he prepared himself for something like this to happen. He wanted to break you, sure, but only because you would be so much more beautiful that way. 

More than anything, he craved for your presence to be next to him again. His heart stung, and he felt himself feel a shred of guilt. Or, was it hatred? Self-loathing? It had to be. You were only serving your purpose, after all. He hadn't meant for you to see his face, he hadn't meant to feel anything for you. You were only supposed to be his greatest masterpiece, your face depicting betrayal, not heartbreak. 

Yet he found himself melancholy in your absence.

When you found yourself in your bed alone the next morning, you somehow felt even worse. You hadn't really expected him to come in to console you, but it didn't mean that you hadn't wished for it.

You'd never felt more stupid than you did now. Ridiculous, even. 

You knew you'd never be able to heal from this wound left in your heart, a piece of you wondered if you'd ever be able to even feel love again. 

When you walked out of the room you had slept in, Jhin was tying the boat to a dock. He wore his mask again, and you found yourself missing the face underneath it.

You sighed to yourself softly, trying to get the thought of him out of your head. 

The sun was blinding, you put your hand over your eyes to shield yourself from it. It looked like you were back in Demacia now. You sighed, relieved to be going back to the castle you had begun to call your home. You missed the safeness you'd felt in your room, which was surprising considering you had tried to leave it. You understood you would most likely never leave this castle alive, so you figured you had to find the beauty in it.

There was a carriage waiting by the dock. 

You hugged the dress you were wearing closely to you and walked towards it.

While you walked, you could feel Jhin's gaze settle on you. It made you shiver. 

Without speaking to him nor looking at him, you sat in the carriage alone. You wished he didn't have to sit next to you, but it was the only other spot he could be. Being close to him like that would just remind you of what it feels like to love Khada Jhin. Getting a feeling that this was going to be a long, silent ride, you laid your head back against the seat and thought.

You were beginning to wonder if it was him you loved, or if it was the mere idea of him. All your life you'd been told stories of a white knight coming to save the princess, freeing her from captivity. Jhin was no white knight, and in this case, he was your captor. You laughed quietly to yourself at this. The irony of it.

How had you fallen for him exactly? 

He was poetic, his words held their own melodies in them. Hidden, deeper meanings were peppered in carefully in every sentence he spoke. The way he touched you, so soft, so gentle. It made your heart hurt. A beautiful artist, just using the worst kind of canvases and paintbrushes to tell his story. 

Such a careful yet soulless man. 

But a part of you had begun to think maybe he wasn't as soulless as you thought. 

Then, you also thought maybe it was also that he didn't want to 'damage' his canvas. Why else would he be so gentle with you? He'd bathed you, taken care of you. Dressed you in elegant gowns, made sure you ate. He even gifted you a piano to play. 

You were startled when he settled into the seat next to you. You turned your head to face the other side. 

You could always wish things were different, but they would never be. You couldn't try to change him, he would never give up his passion for someone like you. Even if he did love you as you did him, would he even put you first? Or would you always come second?

As you had suspected, the entire carriage ride home was spent in a dreadful silence. The tension was so thick you could cut through it with a knife. You both hadn't looked at each other at all, the only sound resonating was the wheels crushing the grains of gravel and dirt from under you. 

When you did arrive home, he took you straight to your room. Only then did he speak to you.

"I won't be back for some time. I have elsewhere to be." You only hummed in response. He lingered for a few seconds after, until you looked at him in confusion. 

Then he left. 

You were alone yet again, for only God's knew how long now. 

You spent all the time he was gone playing your piano all hours of day and night. You barely slept, and you barely ate. 

The only thing that could take your mind off of missing him was the piano that he'd given you. _Ironic_ , you thought. 

You spent your days in a state of sadness, only speaking to Aurora a number of times. Though you'd rather have stayed in your melancholy state, you had to admit, you did enjoy the company she brought. You found yourself confiding in her. It brought you a good sense of comfort, contrary to what you thought it would bring.

You'd also taken the time to write, as well. You wrote to your mother, your father, and your best friend. 

Knowing it would bring you the most sadness, you wrote to Ophelia last. You wrote to Ophelia often. Your latest consisted of paragraphs;

_Ophelia,_

_I'm afraid I've ruined myself... In loving such a monster, I fear that I've made myself much like him. I have no desire to do much with my time anymore, I merely sit around wondering what I could have done instead... I've thought of all of the wrongs I've done in life, and pondered... What could I have done that was so horribly awful to curse myself to live as I do now? In fear? In sadness? In hate?_

_I miss you more than I could ever explain._

You thought of writing to Jhin what you could never say to his face. Maybe if you did, you wouldn't feel so lonely in your own head. 

_I'll do it tomorrow_ , you'd said. Every day. For the past three weeks he'd been gone.

Only on the fourth day of the three weeks did he return. 

Four knocks, as he used to do.

When you hadn't responded, he opened the door himself.

You were sleeping on the bench of your piano. 

With closer inspection, he noticed that your normally fresh face was riddled with lack of sleep. Your eyes had dark circles underneath them, the spots of blue and purple appeared bruised. 

He closed his eyes and sighed. 

Tucking a stray piece of your hair behind your ear, you stirred. He remembered what you said. How could he forget? It'd been all that plagued his mind since he left. He withdrew his hand back quickly from your face. Though, a small piece of him wished to keep it there for his own sake. 

When you didn't wake up, he decided he would bring you to your bed. He picked you up carefully, supporting your head, and covered you with your blanket. 

Jhin sat at the edge of your bed pondering. 

You seemed so sad, he wasn't oblivious. Even if he couldn't feel the things you felt, expressed them as you did, he understood the pain of them. The pain you were feeling. 

He couldn't help but also wish, just as you did, that things were different.

But a wish is only as good as you make it, and he hadn't wished in a long, long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know how you liked it as always <3 i love reading your comments! a lot of sadness this chapter, so i'm so sorry for the heartbreak.


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